Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Christmas Eve 2006

Finally I got around doing this. So please don't bug me anymore.

But... don't you love pictures?!

It really does captures the memories and lets you relive the moment.

Here's my favourite one!!! Just cuz the whole pic is too cool-looking!

Mel da Pimp Daddy
(and no, I refuse to say I'm his Biatch)

Inside Momo at about 10pm, we started with drinks and lots of cam-whoring.

I think Mel already started to get drunk. Look at his red skin.
Jasslyn (my super party buddy) is having a great time with Andy (the terribly good drinking buddy) and my super cute brother (yes, my real blood brother).

My best pal - John - hates the party scene. A LOT. Therefore, I am so happy when he decided to come join us with his wife!!!

Jiaming, my secondary school friend, also had such a great time. I haven't seen him in so long. So glad that he actually took the time to come down. But of course, it is I who is da damn organizer... ... WHO DARES TO NOT SHOW UP?!?!?!

Melson looks so freaky here. I've always told him that he's got bright eyes... and that they reflect light. But this is too much, man...

Uncle Dean is my present colleague. He's so funny and fun to hang out with. Actually he's not that old. I think he's like... early 30s. But I just like calling him Uncle Dean. It sounds good.

JOHN & WENN (the wife)!!! Wenn looks so sweet!!! Mel said she looks like a Jap girl... I think so too!!! I hardly get to hang out with this girl, but it was really nice to go partying together... she's funny and nice!!!

Wenn was about to snap the picture and I jumped in. MWAHAHAHA!!

The Ultimate Hard Worker + the Shrewd Business Mind = Big Bucks + Sky High Reputation

We're so cool, we're hot. I look like I got a terrible tan around the cheeks. Thus, the WHITE panda eyes... hahahaha..

I HATE THIS PICTURE!!!! And stupid Mel even put this up in his Friendster profile. I HATE YOU MEL! So now, I have no choice but to put it up too... cuz it's like... funny yet embarrassing. But you know me, a pic is a pic... if every pic looks good, then it'll start getting boring, no?

I was so NOT ready to take a pic cuz I was talking on the phone. Now, I'm wondering what I was talking about that caused this expression.

Me giving Andy the Finger Lips (but that's a private joke, so I'm not going to blog about it here... mwhahahaha)...

I've known Andy for about 8 years already. We first met in Wong San at Mohd Sultan. This guy can really drink, man. And he's always HOT. And I really mean HOT, this guy's body temperature is on a constant high. He's like.... The Heat Man. Everything or anyone he touches will feel the 'fever hot' heat from his hands. Good if you're cold.

Here are the other pics:

Yeah.... about Jasslyn.... dun ask. I dunno. She's always doing something pornographic. hhahahhahahahahha!!! That's why I love her. Partying will never be the same without her.

Us & Zaoxiang. Too bad we didn't take a pic of his smokin hot gf! Damn that girl makes me wanna turn lesbian....

*sniff sniff*... damn you smell so good, Joyce. Btw, she looks like she's not wearing anything... hahahahhaa...

I love this pic. Mel looks so sweet. And also, he's actually SITTING on a chair & I'm standing... but still I need to tiptoe to take this shot. Damn these tall giants.

The Grudge starring Uncle Dean, Gni (just realized I'm holding a cigarette in almost every pic), Alvin & Mel.

p.s - Mummy, if you see this... ... the cigarette is not mine. I'm holding it for someone. *ahem*...

And this is a pic from Live Impact. A pub with live band and it's just opposite Momo.

Andy had a bunch of his sailor mates there, so Jass & I dropped by to check the place out. I think that other guy on the extreme left is called Freddie. Weird funny guy. hahahha...

And.... that's all folks!!!

Post-Christmas Week


We had so much fun at MOMO!!!

The main reason is becuz... MOST OF MY FRIENDS TURNED UP!!! I really didn't waste my effort, time & money on organizing this Christmas Eve party.

People who turned up:

My Colleague - Uncle Dean, who brought his friends Superman (his name is actually Joe, but he was wearing a Superman T-shirt) & Lois Lane (Cindy, the gf of Joe), and also, a nerdy-looking friend called John.

My Secondary School Buddies - John (my good friend, not the nerdy-looking one) & his wife Wenn. Melson who invited Joyce. Jiaming.

My Poly Mates - Jasslyn (fellow Wild Turkey), Shawn & his friend Desmond. And there was also Zaoxiang (who looks like Ben Yeo) & his gf Sen (who is one pretty babe).

My Party Buddy - Andy (got to know him about 10 years back when the pub Wong San was still around at Mohd Sultan) who had a bunch of friends over at Live Impact, which is just opposite of Momo.

My SIBLING - Alvin (yes... my blood-related brother).

Of course, there was a handful of ppl who couldn't turn up.



It's okay.

Too bad to those who couldn't make it cuz it was plenty of fun. Even though I didn't get to dance like a Wild Turkey with Jasslyn cuz I was so engrossed in chatting and hanging out with everyone.

We even played games that made people drunk in 20mins.

Oh my god.

The group of us were so pissed drunk. Thank god we all managed to find our way back home. Nobody got raped. Nobody slept at void decks. Nobody lost their valuables.

Although I did get Melson a little worried becuz I disappeared after getting a little... ... happy on alcohol... ... ...


And NO, nothing happened to me.

And YES, i got myself home. Alone.


I took some pics with my Sony Ericsson hp. And Wenn took some with her Canon digital camera. Omg... it was so fun!

I'll put the pictures up soon. Like tonight... or tomorrow. Or some day.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Pre-Christmas Week

Damn all these festive seasons.

Especially year-end ones.

Been so damn busy these past week.

Had to finish my month-end reports + year-end reports + payroll + cover duties of the receptionist who went on a long long holiday + entertaining persistent queries on company bonus + answering to friends who felt neglected due to my overly burdened schedule (I'm sorry, okay?!?! I'm SORRY for being so damn busy that I neglected to hang out with you guys!!! Please stop sending me evil sms'es!!!) + organizing a Christmas eve party (who died and made me Organizer???) = a really really bummed out Gni.

Among all the above-mentioned. I have to say that... the NO. 1 most difficult task to accomplish will be the 'Organizing of Christmas Eve party'. It's really no joke having to communicate to 20 ppl. Most of them have their own preferences... and their own schedules... and a whole lot of requests.

I foresee a huge HP bill for the month of December.

For this, I blame MELSON.
You're giving too much stress, bro.

He had told me that he wanted to RELAX and ENJOY this Christmas Eve. And asked me to go organize something.

So I did.

In a favourable situation, there'll be about 20 ppl at my party. About 20 of them agreed to party the night with me, but whether or not they turn up on Christmas Eve will be a different story.




I haven't been partying in so long. I still remember last Christmas & New Year 2006. I stayed home allllll day. Read HERE on my previous post. I swear I'm going to make it different this year.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Fat Bastard

I am so freakin pissed.

My blood is really boiling.

Stay calm, Gni... stay calm.

This afternoon, I bought some cakes and was sharing it with my colleagues at the reception area. As we were eating, this stupid fat indian motherfarker suddenly said,

"you remind me of SGH. your arms look like those old sick people in the hospital."

I have to admit that I was NOT expecting a rude remark like that from this guy. Becuz I took him into my clique at work. I invited him to join my clique during lunch becuz everyone else didn't want to talk to him nor eat with him. I was friendly and nice to him when everyone was ignoring him.

And a remark like this was way beyond my expectation. Especially when it is directly to me... by him. A person I, so kindly, take under my wings.

Being the person who never turns away from a fight, I said to him,

"no, I believe I look much better than that. Besides, at least I'm not the one who is going to die from obesity."

That fat indian motherfarker. To think I even offered the cakes to him.

And this rude remark came from a fat bastard who weighs almost 200kg.

This is really amazing, you know.

Does he even look at himself in the mirror???

He's grossly fat. He smells funky. His hair is severely greying. He's balding. With dandruff (probably from being so afraid of washing all his hair out that he created another problem for himself). And he's only 30. He also looks like a freakin pervert.

And all these time, I was being nice to him becuz 95% of the people in the company dislike him the first time they saw him.

Seriously, I could have said so many mean things to him. I have a lot of 'Fat' jokes that me & my friends pull out every single day of our lives.


At that point of time, I took a deep breath and I swallow back those words.

I am, after all, at work.

And I will definitely NOT portray myself as a mean, crude, spiteful person (although I can be when the need arises) in front of so many colleagues who are gathering around the reception area.

I am most certainly NOT a girl who is self-conscious nor have low self-esteem. Instead, I think very highly of myself... hahahaha...

I do KNOW that I am NOT replusively skinny.

I am skinny. Yes. I have tiny bones like a 12yr old. Yes.

But my frame has never discourage men from pursuing me. And therefore, I know I am still attractive in the eyes of the opposite sex. I know I do not have the body of a Greek goddess. However, I'm not without my charms either.

This fat indian bastard can be sure of one thing.

He has officially declared war against me. Nobody puts me down like that. In fact, even if he said this to another person, it is still downright rude. And nobody should put up with crap like that.

Lunch will never be a pleasant affair for him anymore. Sure, he can join us. But he can be sure that he will have an EXTREMELY hard time swallowing down his food. In fact, he shouldn't be eating. An apple a day will already add kilos to his overgrown waistline.


Letter to the Farker:-

Dear Fat Bastard,

Dun be jealous becuz I'm skinny & beautiful.

And the fact that I can eat practically ANYTHING I WANT, must be killing you inside. Becuz no matter how much you cut down on those calories... no matter how hard you stop yourself from reaching out for a delicious piece of chocolate cake, you will NEVER (hear me well, you fat bastard) NEVER look as good as me. NEVER. There is a reason why no girls will ever look at you. That is becuz apart from your grey balding head that is infected with crusty flakes called dandruff, you are also 200kg, sweaty and you smell really bad.

You think you're funny just becuz I laugh at your lame stupid jokes. But sorry, can't you tell that I was just being nice? Sympathetically nice. For the less privileged. Like yourself.

You want fun?

I'll give you fun.

I assure you that by the time I'm done having my fun, you'll be crying like a baby. And sadly, nobody will be there to hug you. For one, there is no one on earth who can actually wrap their arms around you. Secondly, nobody likes to get close to something that reeks like a rotten pig. Lastly (and unfortunately for you), people still believe that dandruff is contagious.

Let's see just how much you can take.

Spawn of Satan


Tuesday, December 19, 2006

The Scary Me
2 sides

My gal pal told me a week ago that she read my blog and it was scary (no bonus points for guessing which blog posts are the accused).

This morning, I was chatting with my guy friend on MSN. He was telling me a sob story. I told him what I thought about the whole situation. He called me Meanie Jeanie. And then he proceeded to ask me for advice. So I adviced. He said my words are harsh, but true and extremely frightening, so he called me Scary Jeanie. I asked him why Scary? It puzzled me.

Thus he proceeded to say,

"everything about you has some kind of connection to mutilation, torture or death"


I rest my case.

Honestly, I have no idea why he said that.

I'm the happiest person alive. Or rather, I'm the most light-hearted person alive. Or maybe the person who laughs the most in the world (hmmm... I wonder if The Guiness Book of Records has something that I can enter into).


Granted that I love movies like Hostel, Saw I II & III, Texas Chainsaw, etc etc. And help me, God... ... but I only read books by Richard Laymon (if you've never heard of him, then I insist you're a dimwit... hahaha... just kidding!).

My love for gory movies & stories & Eminem is just an interest. Besides, it's entertaining. But that doesn't mean that I want to tear flesh apart with my bare teeth nor rub myself all over with warm thick gooey blood.

I joke a lot about death and torture. But then again, I joke a lot about everything.

In short, I have absolutely nothing to hide.

I am gross. Yes.

I get an adrenaline rush when I see meat tearing and blood squirting. Yes.

But I am a good person. No. Scratch that. I am the BEST person you can ever meet.

Then again, there are many perspectives to the word - BEST.

What I feel is the BEST, might be the opposite for you.

In addition to my so-called gruesome nature, I talk like an arrow heading for the Bull's Eye - straightforward and right on target. My words may hit you right in the heart, but understand that it's becuz I care (plus I don't like to waste time twisting my words around and garnishing it with sugar & spice, thus making it sound mean & scary).

Just understand that my world only has 2 sides.

It's either I like you or I dislike you. There is nothing in between.

If I dislike you, I will just press IGNORE.

Therefore, if I actually take the time to dish out some harsh words to you (even when you're already hurting), it just means I care. And I like you, therefore, I care.

hahahaha... yeah... that's pretty farked up.

If I dislike you, I don't give a shit and I leave you in a corner to die in the blistering cold.

If I like you, my comforting words of support are like arrows in your heart that make your tears roll down from the corner of your eyes.

This reminds me of a time, I once said to a very good friend (actually he posted a comment in one of my post which I am going to be lazy and use the copy & paste function),

"Time waits for no man + So many things left undone + life is unfair, so kill yourself or get over it. If you're weak, and you cannot deal with it, then kill yourself. But if you know you're going to get over it, then why not sooner rather than later."

And right after I told him that, he paused for a really long time. Then he told me that I was damn bloody harsh. But it did jolt him back to reality. And he did get better very soon. And I have claimed full credit for it.

But looking back, he COULD have killed himself right after I said that to him. I was harsh (and perhaps, mean) and inconsiderate of a person's vulnerable feelings. And it was indeed a scary thought. I am downright scary. And sometimes, I scare myself too.

Gni sounds like a vile, vicious, cold-blooded, hard-hearted uncaring bitch. But you forget one thing. When I am vulnerable and depressed, I tell myself the same thing in that same harsh tone. Yes. I tell myself that there are only 2 ways to handle a problem
- just kill myself or get over it.

I guess with me, there are also only 2 sides.

It's either you love me or you hate me.

I would love you to love me, becuz I always love to be loved (and worshipped).

But if you cannot take this caring yet straightforward side of me, then I will just sigh and let you go. Becuz I do not expect anyone to change for me. And neither will I change for anyone (unless there are 10 good reasons for doing so).

For those of you who has stayed by my side for so damn long and actually appreciate the time and effort I have sacrificed & put in... ... ... I just want to get sappy and say (you better brace yourself, cuz you know I hardly ever get soft and cuddly)...


:-D !!!!

Monday, December 18, 2006

Life is Merciful

My boss is the BEST.

She has agreed to let me change my Annual Leave into an MC day.

... if you dunno what I'm talking about, read about my Near-Death Experience HERE , you uncaring bastard... tsk tsk... so disappointed in you...


Life can never be better nor happier.

... no wait... actually life CAN be happier.

But alas, Happiness is like a butterfly - it only comes to you when you are not chasing it.

And I, Gni Lau, am a very impatient person.

I dun have the patience to be sitting around and waiting for butterflies.


Instead, I will run around wildly to try and catch it.

Then I get frustrated and increasingly infuriated.

Thus, grabbing a huge fly-swatter and swinging it around madly... ... ...

... ... ... tearing the butterfly into tiny powdery pieces.

*wild crazy rabid look*


Life is still good so far.

Cuz I haven't gotten my hands on a good fly-swatter yet.

Nor have I contracted rabies.


Sunday, December 17, 2006

Weekend - Busted


I even took a day's leave on Friday, so that I could go out SHOPPING!!!!



(rewind back to Thursday night)


Went to have dinner at Crystal Jade at Toa Payoh.

Yum... delicious.... .... but hmmmmmmm... the Hot & Sour soup is EXCEPTIONALLY sour. But oh well.... slurp slurp... gulp gulp.... omg... it's really sour...

Went to bed at 11+ in the night.


(fast forward a few hours - 3am)


Tummy aches.

... omg... i need to puke... no.... i need to shit... no wait... i need to puke.... ... but I want to sleep!

Tries to get back to sleep.


... i give up... i have to... get.... up.

Go to the toilet to puke.

Feels pity for myself.

Sms my gal pal. And omg, she's not asleep yet. She keeps me company and pities me too.

oh no... now I have to poo poo...

Made a really big bad mess.

I'm a bad bad girl, i know... ... look at what I did to the toilet... I'm ashamed.

My gal pal urges me to go to the 24-hr clinic across my block.

I refuse!!!

does anyone know how cut-throat these 24-hr clinics can be?! $60 for just the consultation fee!

I rather suffer. I rather die.

Lies down in my bed in pain... breaking out in cold sweat...


(fast forward a few more hours)


Omg... I'm alive... YES! I can see daylight... or is it... NO!! Whatever I do... I must not.... step... towards... the light.

Gets out of bed. Walks away from the light.

Feels queasy. Feels dizzy.

Nobody is at home?! WOE IS ME WHO IS SICK AND WEAK!!!!

Curls back into bed.

Sms my friend to take me to a doctor. If I go on my own, I'll fall flat on my face.

Friend told me to wait.

I have to wait.

Lies in bed. Drifts in and out of sleep / consciousness.


(late morning on Friday)


Friend finally arrives.


Calls another clinic. OMG!!! LONG QUEUE TILL 3pm?!?!?!

Drives all the way to a Bedok clinic.

Friend had said, "Bedok easily has 20 clinics in the area. I don't believe we cannot find one that is OPEN and EMPTY."

... i feel so terrible... i think that light is getting warmer...

And when we finally find a clinic, the nurse said, "yes this is a clinic for Botox".

BOTOX?!?! in Bedok?!?! goddamn if I weren't about to puke or shit in my pants, I would have asked for the price.... come to think of it, all the rich ppl are usually the aunties...

Then we came to a clinic. A proper clinic.

I can no longer sit up straight. Without giving a damn about image, I just laid flat on the waiting room couch while my friend went to register for me.



Doctor diagnosed my critical illness as food poisoning.

I knew there was something wrong with the deliciously sour Hot & Sour Soup.

And then, he took my temperature and said that I was having a high fever - 38.6 degrees.

Omg, I almost fried my own brains. No wonder I was getting the chills and feeling severely dizzy.

To top it all up, the doctor decided to give me a jab on the butt. So that I won't start puking on his leather shoes.

I'm not lying when I say that I am definitely NOT afraid of pins nor needles. I mean, I have piercings on my body where it would really hurt.

But I'm not kidding when I say that... ... THE JAB FREAKIN HURT!

I have a high tolerance of pain, but this is seriously painful... ... for like.... ... 30secs.

The doctor then sticked a plaster on my butt and when I took it out the next day (which was Saturday), I was amazed. So, I do what I do best.

I took a picture.


Ok... that doesn't sound right.

Everything I say never comes out right.


(back to present day)


It's Sunday and I'm supposed to be going out with Melson to watch Saw III.

But after being on the verge of death for 2 days, I dun think I'll be too healthy today to go out.

I did watch a whole lot of DVDs though.

And now, it's time to sleep. Cuz I have to work tomorrow.

yes... time waits for no man... even when one just barely escapes from the brink of death.

Life has no mercy and is unkind.

I also wonder if my boss will cancel the annual leave that I applied on Friday and allow me to apply it as an MC day instead.

... please at least show mercy on this one... ... please!

On one last note... ...

The Sexiest Man Alive

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The End of Trying Times

"Listen to me. And listen hard.
I will care no more.
I detest fair-weathered people. And people who do not have loyalty. People who do not stick by me thru thick-and-thin. People who take advantage and take for granted the things that they have been given unconditionally.
I know you will regret one day.
I am sick of ass-kissers and boot-lickers. I have grown tired of people trying to be goody-2-shoes and betraying the one person who actually believed in them.
I will never be there when you need me anymore.
No more will I stand up for you.
No more will I fight for you.
I have grown to learn that I have been fighting your battles for you and fighting my own on my own.
Don't ever come to me asking for help nor comfort becuz I will provide no more.
I have done all I can for as long I can manage.
Everyday, I prayed to God to give me the strength to accept the things that I cannot change. And everytime I hold on tighter, I get more and more disappointed.
It seems like I'm the only one who cared for anything.
It seems like I'm the only one who genuinely cared.
I had known that soon, I will grow weary.
And truth be told, this day has arrived.
For each time, I look at your faces, I get sicker every minute.
Once I step out of the circle, I will never set foot inside again."

Read this from a book called - Last Words.

I somehow managed to relate to this.

The world is never kind enough to appreciate anything.

It's every man for himself.

Maybe it's time for me to do the same.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

The 2-headed Snake

10 years ago, my friend called me a 2-headed snake. Technically, it means that a person is a hypocrite. But but... I was never a hypocrite! Or rather, I try my best not to be.

But in actual fact, what he eventually meant was... that I was a person of 2 faces.

... wait... that sounds equally bad...

Let me explain.

There are always 2 sides to a person - the good, the bad & the ugly (wait a min... that's 3 sides).

And for all my friends know, I am the classic (and extreme) case of a Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde.

When I'm nice, I'm verrrrrrrrryyyyy nice.

When I'm bad, I'm verrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyy bad.

Towards people who appreciate me & who spare a thought for me, I can have the utmost tolerance towards them. You can push me into a mud puddle & I'll laugh. You can wake me up at 3am in the morning, crying for help and I'll be there. Ask for a dollar & I'll give you 10.

But as for people who show me unreasonable attitude & fair-weathered behaviours, I can be extremely stingy and mean. Owe me 10 cents, and I'll take back 10 cents. Tell me to do something and I'll ask you to go fuck yourself. Ask me for help, and I'll say that you don't deserve it.

Then there are days when I wake up feeling like a million dollars + overly self-assured = arrogance.

And there are also times when I feel like a Shrek (aka downright ugly ogre).


I remember there was one time, when we were shopping and my friend pointed to several clothings, but I was like...

"i cannot wear that. i'm too skinny."

"nahhhh. my ass will look too huge."

"I got chicken legs."

"it will show my bony shoulders."
"my boobs are too small."

Suddenly, he took out an imaginary gun and point it over my left shoulder.

*BAM BAM BAM*, he went.

I was like... (-_O) ??????

And he said to me, "I am shooting your evil head".


There was another time when I was put in a situation where I was seriously being taken advantage of.

People kept asking for stuff and I kept giving. And they kept taking and I kept giving. And then they toss me aside like a useless rag doll, only picking me up again when they need something. And still, I kept giving.

My friend got so tired of looking at me wear myself out for unappreciative people.

And so he said, "give the good head a break. now is the time to listen to the evil one".

I paused.

And I listened to what the spawn of Satan had to say.


It is clear to me that while I should be nice to people whom I have a responsibility to, I should still give them limits and not let them take advantage of me.
For such a long time, I've been a freakin sponge... just soaking up all the abuse.
But it is time to let the Demon come out and play.
No more Little Ms Muffet who sat on a freakin uncomfortable Tuffet, eating her stupid bland curds & whey.
Uh uh.
Little Ms Muffet is going to throw out that stupid Tuffet and thrash the bland curds & whey.
She is going to buy a kickass recliner sofa + gourmet food, and she will get those lazy & unreasonably stubborn assholes to come kiss her ass every morning & wipe it clean every night.
Becuz why?
Becuz she freakin deserves it for slogging her entire day at work and taking the shit out everyday.
You better be scared.
Be verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyy scared.
Jenine (the name of the evil head) will not take this lying down.
*pats the slithering head*
You want the beast?
You will HAVE the beast.

Monday, December 11, 2006


In the face of anger, do not sin.

Forgiveness will be a greater virtue.

"We hide our miserable behind our smiles & laughter. It's like putting on that smile, we will eventually lead ourselves to think that we're actually happy & carefree. But deep inside, we all know that we're searching for the happiness that we'll never have"

Amen to that.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Can't Get Over It

As per my previous post - Pervert on MSN, I was already freakin pissed before that stupid pervert irritated me.

I still can't get over it.

I have never been so angry in my life.

Some people are just PLAIN STUPID.

If you're so free, why don't you go out and work instead of destroying my things?!?!

Farkin lazy morons.

When I do something wrong, you get mad.

When you do something wrong, you turn the tables on me and you still get mad.

Where is the farkin logic?!

If you can't even set a good example, don't expect me to take it lightly.

You went ahead and did something so farkin stupid and you expect me to just take it lightly and not say a word?!?!

You farkin out of your mind.

Trust me.

I've already let you off LIGHTLY. So don't you come and freakin turn the tables on me and pick stupid things to push the blame on me becuz I did NOT do ANYTHING WRONG.

Get that in your stupid head.

Be a farkin grown up and face your own mistakes, instead of being such a goddamn coward.

I despise you.

I detest you.

I have tolerate long enough and this is the end.

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Pervert on MSN

I have an account in Friendster.

I have pictures in it too.

And there are many reasons why people put their pics up in Friendster. Honestly, we all put pictures of us LOOKING GOOD. Who in the bloody hell will purposely put UGLY pictures of themselves for all to see (opps, I do have some incredibly goofy pics in there which I put up on purpose).

There are many reasons why ppl have a Friendster account with cool-looking pics.

Keeping in touch with friends
Finding friends whom you have lost touch with
Looking for love
Seeking for acceptance
To show yourself and others how good (bad) you can actually look
Simply becuz it's fun
Simply becuz everyone has an account, and so you think it's cool you have one too
... etc etc... and the list goes on and on

Sad to say, there are also PERVERTS who wants to make new 'friends' cuz they are moronic assholes who think that they can fool around with ppl.

- just becuz a person's pictures look spontaneous and fun, doesn't mean that they are looking for sex... and neither are they CHEAP.

I guess it's only human nature to judge a person at face value.

Though I admit that I joke a lot about kinky stuff and I know how to play & have fun, but that doesn't mean that I flirt or sleep around with any Ah Mao (cat) Ah Gou (dog).

This can be explained in very simple terms.

In this jokes & sleeping around context, there are exactly 4 types of categories in this world:

1st - people who are all talk, but no action
2nd - people who are no talk, and all action
3rd - people who are no talk and no action
4th - people who are all talk and all action

- I am in the 1st category

So if you think that you know all about me by just reading my blog or looking at my profile in Friendster or by viewing my pictures, then you are SO WRONG.

People are not always how they seem to be.

I just know how to joke about kinky stuff. Everyone laughs at the joke. The End.

Sorry to disappoint.

But yours truely here hasn't been getting any action (but i can't say how long or i'll have to terminate you).

Woe is me who is holy and pure and so very misunderstood.

And just to show you how disgusting men can be.

This is the MSN conversation.

And following that, this farker just doesn't get it and can even ask, "so how does a man turn you on? by licking your ear?"


It's like... I already have this super pissed off MSN pic and a freakin angry MSN nick, and this moron just goes on asking stupid questions.

I was already have such a freakin bad day and here comes this motherfarker to irritate me even further.

The need to kill somebody is even greater now.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Waiting for Food

Me & my colleagues at work got really sick of the prison food that they serve at Gul Circle.

It's tasteless.

It's boring.

The rice either tastes like dry grains or sticky chewy glutinous cakes.

The vegetables are old and greying (or yellowing).

The meat is hard and stale.

Therefore, we have decided to order... ... KFC!!!

Finally, something that humans can eat.

However, the lines doesn't open till 11am.

So we wait.

Then at 1100hrs, I called the delivery hotline.

And the customer service told me that we have to wait 90mins (1.5hrs) for the delivery to reach our place.

I was like, "WHAT?!"

And she was like, "yeah... becuz you guys are in Gul Circle. It's quite far and the store that is serving your location isn't open yet".

Then I was thinking, "which freakin store doesn't open at 11am?!?!"

But she didn't even offer to take my order first, so I thought I had to wait for the store to open before I can do that.

Major (-_-") bummer.

But I called again 2mins later, and another person picked up the call (this time, it was a guy). And he confirmed with me that we CAN order now. So, I was slightly irritated cuz the previous lady was just giving me the wrong signals.

But since I'm so nice, I didn't pursue the matter.

However, we still gotta wait 90mins for the food.

Our lunch hour is only 40mins. From 12.30pm to 1.10pm.

And I bet those KFCF (Kentucky Fried Chicken Farkers) will definitely be late.

Dilys said that by 12.15pm, if the delivery hasn't arrived, she will call and fark them upside down. Whoa. That's fierce. But Shivanan didn't call her CRUELLA DILYS for no reason.

*tick tick tick tick tick*

Soon, it was 12.15pm.

Our order really hasn't arrived.

People getting anxious now.

Dilys gave them a ring to hurry them. They said they were ON-THE-WAY (but of course, we all knew the KFCF were lying).

*tick tick tick tick tick*

Then it was 12.45pm.


Dilys getting pissed now (serious uh-oh here). And she made THE CALL. She sure gave them a piece of her mind.

And while she was at it, I did what I do best.


Here's a picture of Dilys on the phone & giving the KFCF a hard time. But the second she saw my camera pointing in her direction, she posed for the picture!!!

I took a picture of Shivanan, sitting at the receptionist desk & working on his Sudoku. I just don't understand why people feel that it's such a fun game. And yup. I caught him unaware when I took his picture... cuz this guy is so cute, but he just freezes up in front of the camera and will eventually fark-up the pic.

And here is........... THE LITTLE MASTER!!! Eugene is the smallest, cutest & funniest man-boy you have ever seen.

There was this one time when he walked from the Shipping Dept which is in another building & arrived at the Accounts Dept in SUPER quick time. And Shivanan was like, "how did you get here so fast?!"

Eugene simply replied with a seriously straight face, "oh. becuz I know kungfu, so I qing gong all the way here."

qing gong = the half-flying half-running stance. if you've watched mandarin movies filmed with kung fu masters who can cross the river by threading lightly on the water, you will know what i mean.

And from that moment on, Shivanan nicknamed him... THE LITTLE MASTER.

Finally the food arrived at 12.50pm.

We were so not happy with the FKFCF (Freakin Kentucky Fried Chicken Farkers).

My HR manager paid for the meal cuz she wanted to give us an early treat for Christmas. Yes. My boss is SO NICE & KIND!!! I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE THIS PLACE!!!

Anyway, we ate really quickly.

As expected, The Little Master finished his food before all of us did. Must be the kung fu.

Cruella Dilys made fun of everyone in her own usual picking-on-people style. Which was extremely funny, if you're not the victim of her jokes.

Shivanan ate his food using ALL his fingers + palm (yeah, i don't get the palm thing too). And Dilys just has this Obsessive Complusive Disorder where she cannot STAND to see dirty hands, so she kept asking Shivanan to clean them. And he, in turn, loves to torment her with his soiled fingers.

My colleagues are too funny.

I guess I'm lucky that way.

In all my previous jobs, I managed to find a few pals whom we can all get along with.

Fun at work = Motivation = Good Attendance = Not giving the boss any inconvenience due to my absence = Taken into consideration during Performance Appraisals = Better chance of getting an increment = More money to spend in the future = Job & Personal Satisfaction = A Better + Happier Life = Laugh more often = Secret to Staying Young + Looking Youthful


Just look at the benefits.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Mind Reader

I swear my guy friend can tell the future.

Either that, or he has been seriously stalking me for a long long time.

After work, Jason* and I went out for dinner yesterday.

I was telling him that I will be meeting my group of ex-NYP friends and I was wondering what to wear.

... what?! don't look at me like that. i know it's not a date, but i haven't seen these ppl in 12 months already, ok?!


This is how it goes:

Jason: So when are we going to watch Saw III?

Me: I can't make it this week. Tomorrow (which is Thurs), I'll be meeting my poly friends for dinner in town. Then Friday, maybe going out with my colleagues for dinner. And Saturday, already arranged to meet my ex-colleagues for lunch. And Sunday, it's my family day (or rather it's an excuse to stay home and laze all day before a new week of work, but of course I don't tell him that).

Jason: AIYA YOUUUUU... everytime say busy busy busy... THEN WHEN?!?!

Me: wat??? I already said that this Thurs, Fri, Sat & Sun I cannot make it. Oh. Plus next Tuesday, cuz I'm meeting my ex-colleagues for dinner. Again. So besides these days, the rest I'm available. You choose the day lah!

Jason: ... I choose ah. hmmm... ok. How about.... .... ahhh! *light bulb appears at the top of his head* Next Tuesday.


Jason: ... hmmm... ok lor. Then Thurs.

Me: WEI !!!

Jason: .... ... or Fri and this weekend also can.


Jason: ... AIYAAAA... then you ask me to CHOOSE!

Me: hmmm... I wonder what should I wear tmw at the poly gathering.

(Jason didn't even question the sudden change in topic. Apparently, he is already used to me having short attention spans & diverting from conversations even before it completely ended)

Me: hmmm.. wat shd I wear wat shd I wear?

*me visualizing a white top and green skirt for like 2 secs*

Jason: You will be wearing a white top.

Me: OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU KNOW?!?!?!?!?!?!

*both laughs hysterically*

Me: Can you guess which bottom I will be wearing?

Jason: Hmmm.... my favorite skirt. The green one.


*he starts laughing*

*me start whacking him on the arm*

Me: This is not funny anymore. HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?!?! That's it, I will PURPOSELY NOT wear that attire. Hmmmm... let me think of something else to wear.

*me visualizing my black top from Phuture London*

Jason: Then you wear that top that we bought together from Phuture London lor.

Me: ... (-_O) !!!!... ... ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!


What is wrong with Jason?!

Can he read minds?

Can he see into the future?

Can he look back into the past?

Or has he been STALKING me for so long that he actually knows wat I'm thinking?!

Stay tuned for more incredible updates...

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Seeing the Light

Had a conversation with a friend.

He reminded me so much of myself... when I was still young. (keyword being WAS = in the past)

After talking to him, I see the light. Both of us are at different points of our lives. I have passed that point... and he's just beginning it.

Sometimes, I think that life works in mysterious ways.

I started to forget what emotions felt like.

And he comes along.

Then I almost stepped down the path that I had tried to leave behind and at the end of this path, will be a plank where I jump off the cliff.

p.s - jumping off the cliff doesn't mean it's a bad thing. it just means that i'm just willing to take a risk in doing something that i want.

Then all of the sudden, I decided to leave fate in the hands of God (not that I'm religious or anything).

Actually, my gal friend was keeping my feet on the ground. And I told her that this friend promised to do something. So, if he doesn't keep his promise, then I'll continue my path on the normal safe road. If he actually does what he promised, then I'll just continue to jump off the plank and off the cliff.

... hahahahahahhaahhaa...

I know. I'm addicted to chaos and destruction.

What is life without living it with a bit of excitement?

Anyway, at the end of the night, the promise wasn't kept.

And I suddenly see the light.

*hears angel bells & sees bright white light*

I think God is giving me a sign.

He's like... patting me on the back and smiling at me and he is telling me,

"you are trying to be a better person everyday, I know. You were starting to go back to Neverland, so I sent someone to find your way back to Me. Now, you have a better understanding of the world and young people... as you yourself were young & foolish once. Just know that at the end of the road, the most important things for a person is their Pride & Integrity."

Neverland = the land where Peter Pan lives and everyone remains as a child there

And I look up into the sky (which I actually do a lot).

I have to admit that I do feel a sense of lost.

Letting go is never easy.

I could never let go of the fact that I lost Jerry becuz I was so dumb and young and foolish and playful and... ... ... ... ok, enough of regrets. But the impt thing is that, he taught me how to grow up and put in that extra effort in a relationship. To treasure and to appreciate even the little things.

I have difficulties letting go of this friend too. Simply becuz I adore him (yes i admit it. And i hardly adore anyone except myself.. hahahahaha). He actually taught me something too... ... and it's that I realized that I have became more understanding and accepting to others.

(i have to say this again) He reminded me so much of myself when I was young. The resemblance is so uncanny! (omg.. is that why I adore him?! Cuz it's like... I adore myself and thus, I adore everyone who resembles me).

Strangely, I am not pissed about the broken promise. I am extremely bummed about it. But I am not pissed.

I believe that we should never tell people to change or do things (but this doesn't mean we cannot REQUEST them to do it), but they should feel the need to change or do things on their own free will.

No point forcing people to do things.

Forced entry is always painful.

... ahahhahahahahha... stop thinking dirty, you people. My blog is only for the innocents. Or at least, I try to keep it that way. Lots of underage ppl reading this.

Life goes on.

People will come and go. But no matter what, you'll always remember them.

But we should always look forward to happy endings (well, actually in life, THERE ARE NO HAPPY ENDINGS. But still, just try to lie to yourselves. HAHAHA).

Every episode in life teaches you a valuable lesson.


p.s - i just re-read this entire blog post and i have absolutely no idea what i am trying to say. it's like the Devil and God are both helping me to write it at the same time. i'm already trying to maintain a balance, but i'm like evil and yet, trying to be good at the same time. it's so contradicting. well... ... as the famous saying goes, "the mind is strong, but the flesh is weak".

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


Prior to my previous post - Possessed, I recall a conversation with a friend of mine.

And it became a metaphor concerning Trophies and Competition.

At one glance, I might seem to be competitive. But as a person gets to know the both of us better, they will soon come to realize that she and I are similar.

The only difference is that I'm outspoken about my competitiveness. And she is very much subtle.

I kinda have this sudden outbursts of energy where I want to share with the whole world about what I want to win and how I am going to win it.

For her, she doesn't talk about it with everyone. Only a selected few.

Also, I'm more of a variety kind of person. I like to collect trophies in all kinds of categories... ... like Swimming, Hockey, Aggressive Sports, Dance competitions, Essay Writings, Art, etc etc. It's like I am challenging myself to see exactly how diversed I can get.

Whereas for my friend, she prefers to be the BEST among the rest. It's like, she picks a category.... ... for example, Swimming. And she wants to know that she's better than the other person in Freestyle / Butterfly / Backstroke.

But this kind of competitiveness has to stop for me.

I am 27 years old and I should be maturing.

Not indulging in feeding that evil sin called Pride. It's time to leave Neverland and return to the real world where people of the MATURED age do MATURED things.

But but...

I really don't want to grow uppppppppppppppp!

All these added burdens. And accumulated stress. With undeniable responsibilities that I have to shoulder.

I hate to rush into things. And I hate people to rush me.

I know what I have to do. It's just that.... well, I'm taking my time and planning out my whole entire life. We're talking about another (at least) 40 years here, alright?!

... ... so, the planning is going to take a little longer.

At times, I just feel like I'm still 18.

And I'm living life as a challenge.

I have to win my trophies before I win the biggest and most gorgeous trophy that make me wanna polish it every single day.

Then maybe I'll decide to grow up.

Monday, December 04, 2006


I've been thinking for 2 consecutive days already. And I still cannot understand why I did what I did on Friday night.

It's like... 1.5 years of good conduct just went down the drain.

Whatever possessed me to do THAT?????

What the hell happened to me?!

It's like when you're in the army and you trained really hard to achieve that great looking body of yours. Then all of the sudden, it just takes ONE thing to set you off and you start to gorge down tons of fatty oily food in one night.

All that perseverance and all that determination...

... together with, that squeaky clean record.



I guess what they say about the leopard is true after all.


No matter how hard you try. You just continue to be silly and rash and implusive.

It's like a drunk who can never completely stop drinking.

Like a man addicted to crack and cocaine.

And like someone who cannot control his temper.

I guess it takes more than a conscious effort to have a lot of self-control and to remain clear-headed.

Quit smoking.

Stay away from party scenes.

Think before action.

Keep temper in check.

Knowing your alcohol limit.

Not giving in to temptations.


It's tough being human... especially, when you want to be the perfect being.

I guess my greatest sin among the 7... ... would be... .... PRIDE.

It's always 2nd nature to me.... to WANT to possess anything nice and great. To boost my ego and have this self-indulgence thought that I once had something good. It doesn't even matter if that thing is actually good for me or not. Or if I actually want it or not.

The addiction to P.R.I.D.E is just too much for me to take.

I have to give in to it!

I wish I could have more self-control on Friday night.

I should have been more clear-headed.

A little perseverance would have helped too.

But instead, I had to be too nice to reject it.

Something so nice and wonderful just fell into my lap... and I just had to give in to temptation. I had to welcome it with open arms. I had to touch it. Prode at it. And in the end, I wrap myself in that cocoon of wilful pride and relish in that emotional high.

But well, I guess it's not point brooding over it.

Just live for the moment.