Saturday, October 22, 2005


I can already predict that it's gonna be a fun party! Everyone dressing up as a mystical fantasy... gothic chic... ghouls... demons... vampires... playboy bunnies... cross-dressers...

and I am still thinking of what to be... a gothic rock star? An arabian princess? The undead? Or... Ju-On?... actually for Ju-On, I don't need any make-up at all... so it saves $$ and time. Or I can go as my favourite superhero... SUPERMAN!!!... but I don't have any red spandex underwear... can I replace that with my black g-string??... or maybe Wonder Woman... although I may have to get extra EXTRA padding for my chest...

... maybe I should go shop around for costumes... maybe I'll get some inspiration. Hey hey.... don't think that just becuz I'm 26, I won't get excited over parties, ok? Sometimes it's nice to go out and do something bold and daring... it'll be FUN!

I mean... how often do you actually get to wear something weird and totally eccentric??

Also... HALLOWEEN is the ONLY day where tranverstites and cross-dressers will not be laughed at nor frowned upon.

Melson said that he might be going to the party... dressed as.... BRITNEY SPEARS in 'Baby Hit Me One More Time'... ahhahahahaha...

John should go as the very green-coloured INCREDIBLE HULK.... ARRRRRRRRR!!!

Annur should dress as M.I.C.K.E.Y M.O.U.S.E... hahaha.. but really, she should go as CHRISTINA AGUILERA... with long black hair and skimpy see-thru lingerie... BANG-ABLE!!!

And... as for me... maybe I should go as a Genie... ... ... Jeanie the Genie. Lame.... ARGGHH!!! Everybody gets to fit well into a Halloween costume... and all I can think of is being... Jeanie the Genie!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... lousyyyyyy... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

How about Dominatrix? RRRrrrrRRRrrrrr... black leather, chains and whip...

AH HA! Since I'm forgetful, maybe I should dress up as 10-seconds Tom in 50 First Dates!

Or maybe... becuz of my split personalities, I can go as SMIGEL in Lord of The Rings... hahaha... yeah yeah Annur... laugh all you want.... hahahhahaha...

Ok ok... I better think of something GOOD... and QUICK!

Thursday, October 20, 2005


Read this... and you better feel GUILTY about it if you're one of them. And I wrote this in a FEMALE point of view (which may seem that I'm just targeting men), but I agree that some women behave like this too... and I feel embarrassed for my Women counterparts...

Number 1 & 2 TURN-OFFs
Recently, I went out with my male friend & his gf. We went to the movies and after he paid for the tickets, he asked his gf to pay her own ticket. When we went to have dinner, he made his gf order food (and I dun think he even gave her any $ to buy the food either). When he pushes a door open, he doesn't hold it open for his gf. And then we went to a nice cozy place for coffee, and the bill was $52.70 and guess wat??? He said to his gf, "you owe me $26 for this". Then when it's time to go back, he just walked to the MRT station and then turned around and said, "bye bye" and walked off in the opposite direction.

... wahhh... so 'GENTLEMAN' horrrr! At least, give a NICER goodbye lah! Not as if your gf is DYING to let you send her home... she can go home by herself, but AT LEAST be NICER, can or not?!?!

Number 1 turn-off is... UN-GENTLEMANLY idiots!

I mean... wat the fark?! Lucky he's not my bf. If you want to be so damn bloody calculative, then don't have a gf! You cannot AFFORD to have a gf, you farker! You better look after yourself first, before you even try to look after another person. If you have a baby, are you going to ask your child you PAY you back for all the pampers and milk and clothes and education that you have spent?!?!

It's not that I'm very supportive of materialistic stuff... but think of it this way, if a girl agrees to be your gf, then she will also see if you're a responsible man who will look after her wat.... correct or not? If you're so calculative, then your gf will be wondering whether you are going to be a responsible family man who will be able to WHOLE-HEARTEDLY look after his own family??? What if after she gives birth, she can't go back to work?? Then how the hell do you expect her to PAY you back??

Come on la... just think about it this way, you have a wife who buys groceries, then comes back and tells you, "eh.. the groceries cost $80. You owe me $40 for this becuz you're going to eat half of it."

... or... "eh... the baby needs pampers and milk, I go and buy first... later then we split the cost half-half."

... or... "Everyday, I cook and clean for you... I want to take some salary from you. Not much la... $500 every month will do."

Oh god... you people... don't you think that when you have this kind of conversations, it will somehow feel very... cold? Very distance? It's like not a CLOSE & LOVING & GIVING relationship at all!!! My goodness.... hai... so yeah... my Number 2 turn-off is... CALCULATIVE MEN!!!

Number 3 TURN-OFF
Those goddamn grumpy and naggy men.... .... WORSE THAN GIRL, SIA!!!! Stop nagging and picking on small little things la, pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! You really know how to spoil people's day. From sunshine, will become thunderstorm. The birds flying in the sky, also will drop dead on the ground. Just dun grumble... and dun nag... just pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.... oh god...

Number 4 TURN-OFF
Men who say in an insulting & sarcastic way, "You mean you dunno how to do this ah??"

Then when you reply, "Ya... I dunno."... and then, they will reply, "If we hire you, it means that we expect you to KNOW all these programs."

SIAO AH... if I know how to do EVERYTHING, then I won't be working in your company already. In fact, I can be your boss.

And you stupid moron... you hire me as ADMIN, ok?! Not GRAPHIC DESIGNER, or WEBSITE DESIGNER or ADVERTISING CONSULTANT or NETWORK TECHNICIAN. The things you asking for is really too much lor... use your brain, ok?!?!

And by the way, if you hire me becuz you think that I'm so SMART and can do EVERYTHING, then why you pay me so damn LITTLE?

Number 5 TURN-OFF
Men with bright, colourful hair... looks so Ah Beng.

Number 6 TURN-OFF
Dun show off la, please.... so wat if you're rich... you don't OWN me. Take care of me, but please don't BUY me. I don't need diamonds... and I don't need a car. And bloody hell, don't think I'm that stupid, ok? You buy me diamonds to show PEOPLE that you can afford it... and you want to buy me a car becuz you want me to DRIVE YOU & YOUR FRIENDS around. You didn't buy it becuz you love me.... you stupid Show-Off.

Number 7 TURN-OFF
Men who say, "Don't worry... I will look after you. I won't let you go hungry... and you don't have to go and work. I will give you money every month and buy you anything you want. Just listen to what I say and do what I tell you to do, then everything will be ok."
... bahhhhhhhhhh.... fark off, you MCP.

Number 8 TURN-OFF
Men who hit women.... ROAR!!!!!!

Number 9 TURN-OFF
Men who lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie... *sigh*..

Number 10 TURN-OFF
Men who cheats on their gfs / wives. You think it's very fun, right?? How would you like it if you found out that your gf / wife has been sucking another guy's dick & coming home to kiss you on the lips? Do you think you will like that to happen to you?!?!

... and now I'm just going to add Number 11 just for the heck of it... ... and that is, SECRETIVE PEOPLE!!! I dunno why... I just think that secrets make people drift apart somehow. If I share a secret with you, it means that I trust you. And if you feel that you have to hide a lot of things from me, does it mean that you think that I'm going to use the information to harm you? If you think that I'm that evil, then don't be my friend.

Me and a few close friends, we share EVERYTHING - our clothes, our money, our bank account numbers, our private jokes, our lives, our most favourite things...

So... ok. I'm pissed off at somebody today... and he's listed in my TOP 10 or 11.


Wednesday, October 19, 2005


Today, 18 October 2005... you will forever be remembered. You will be remembered for all the laughter, tears and joy that you have accompanied me through. All the journey that we have walked... and all the dirty rain & mud that we have stepped into... all those washing and cleaning that you have to go thru, just to make me look clean & nice while wearing you. I love you, my pair of jeans... and I will always miss your smooth tight fabric... always making my thighs and butt look good in you. Poor jeans... now you're stained forever... dirtied.. and soiled... and tarnished by the evil people who are so damn jealous of me... just becuz I look good wearing you.



Shuenn Jye says, "This is an honor retirement. Most of your kind was disposed becuz they got out of fashion, but you.... you served Jeanie to your last breath. BRAVO!"

Gwen says, "Ask them for red ink... then draw petals... ahhahahaa.."

Joanne** says, "Add more colours la... then make another pattern. Still can wear wat..."

Gina my little sister says, "Eh... actually nice leh... I will wear it out."


But... no... sorry... I will not add more colours... and dream on, Gina Lau... I will not let you have my beloved jeans.. hahahahahhaha...

I think I shall... gather a few close friends. And bring my jeans to East Coast Park... with a box of ATTACK... a bottle of lavender-frangance softener... and dig a deep deep hole... and finally, give my beloved jeans a proper burial.

*kiss*... *tear drops from the corner of my eyes*...

... leave me alone... I just want to be alone today... just me and my jeans... for the last time...

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Say HELLOOOOOOOO to my little friends... --> Evil C & Good C!!!

I realized that I was very rude in my previous blog post... when Evil C & Good C appeared, I didn't introduce all of you to them.

They are my Evil Conscience & Good Conscience.

Everyday, from the second I wake up to the time I fall asleep, I always have Evil C and Good C with me. When I was much younger, I like playing with E... but since I started to grow up, I try to listen to G most of the time now.

Right now... on a Friday night, I'm at home... sitting in front of the computer... msn'ing my friends (one in KL & one in Australia)... and also, typing my blog.

E & G are talking to me.... but tonight, I don't feel like listening to them becuz I'm so tired... but yet... the night is still young... ...

E:- ... go out la.. .it's freakin Friday night... go out and party the night away...
G:- ... no no... even if you want to go out, dun go party... it's not good for your health... so much smoke and alcohol and loud music...
E:- ... but it's fun wat... that's the whole point in partying... to meet people and play...
G:- ... aiya... shuddup la... if Jeanie doesn't want to go, then don't keep persuading her la. These past few years, she has grown up already. Besides, parties have a lot of bad evil people.
E:- ... fine... then stay at home and be bored to death...
G:- ... no ah.... there are still fun things to do at home...
E:- ... like wat?!?!
G:- ... like listening to mp3... chatting with friends on MSN... typing blogs. Good, right? It's relaxing... can catch up with friends. It's not boring mah...
E:- ... yeah right... so many party invitations & still want to stay at home and rot...
G:- ... people can invite Jeanie, but doesn't mean that she has to go wat. Anyway, those people are all so... ... ... wild and crazy.
E:- ... WILD AND CRAZY THEN IT'S FUN WAT!!! YOU SIAO AH YOU?! Want to stay at home and rot like a little old woman, is it?!

Aiya... the both of you just SHUDDUP la... just leave me alone... I just want to take my shower and go to sleep. I dun want to go out and party... and I also dun want to use the computer anymore. I just want to go and sleep early...

E:- ... fine... go and sleep.
G:- ... fine... let's just SHUDDUP.
E:- ... must be PMS...
G:- ... cannot be... her period just ended last week, so can't be PMS.
E:- ... ok... mood swing...
G:- ... ya... must be.... today had a very tough day at work mah... can't blame her... shhhhh... dun talk already... let her rest... tomorrow she still need to go see doctor at 8am.
E:- ... stupid bitch...

OI... I heard that ok... just shuddup la... you idiot E.

So... yeah....

Say HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOO to my little friends....

... and goodnight for tonight.

Friday, October 14, 2005


Sometimes, after work, I go to the gym with my friend - John. He's actually like the gym instructor from HELL... always insulting me... laughing at me, scolding & terrorising me. But I feel good... becuz I can feel my muscle aching, body firming, self-esteem growing...

Evil Conscience:- HUH??... wait... self-esteem GROWING?! After reading this idiotic girl's previous post - "TODAY'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY" -, and her silly Wit Charm & Sex Appeal nonsense... her self-esteem can STILL GROW?! Not high enough ah?!

Oi oi oi... cannot, is it??? Is it a crime to love myself? No, right? Then shuddup.

Evil Conscience:- ... I want to slap her...
Good Conscience:- ... It's good to have high self-esteem... it's good for the soul.
Evil Conscience:- ... I want to slap you too...
Good Conscience:- ... oh, Evil C... dun hate us cuz we're beautiful...
Evil Conscience:- ... WAT?! ... *pukeeeeeeee*...

Anyway, as I was saying... I was at the gym today. And I really got the bloody mood to torture and rip my freakin muscles apart!!!

Sometimes when I work out alone, I can still hear John scream and yell and insult the hell out of me... until I was lifting those goddamn weights more and more... but then, later I got lazy when it came to the back muscle exercise.

I hate working out on my back and shoulders the most! So, I tried to cheat a bit and use my momentum to SWING myself up instead of using the proper muscles to LIFT myself up. And John spotted it immediately... and he said REAL LOUDLY, "WAT ARE YOU DOING... WAT THE HELL AT YOU DOING?!?! WORK OUT THAT FUCKING MUSCLE PROPERLY!!!!!!"...


... but it's thanks to him that I see my body changing into something better. Most of the time, I go to the gym alone... but it's fun to go with John becuz we keep laughing and making fun of each other.

When we see a body-builder lift the WHOLE stack of weights, we will be like, "wahhhhhh... so impressive". Then John will say, "chey... I also can". And he will.. ARRRR... and SHHSSSS... and URRGHHHH... but he CAN'T even manage to lift those weights... and then, he will slowly side-glance at me... and we will start laughing and say, "booooooooo... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... lousy!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

... ahhahahhahahha!!!

However... we also suspect that the gym staffs want to make an announcement on the loudspeaker... ... "will the 2 idiots please quiet down... or leave the goddamn gym?!"

... hahahahhaha.... NO, we will NOT.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005


... and I feel like I'm high on drugs today! I wonder why.. but as I woke up, I feel like I have an extremely high self-esteem... hahaha... ok FINE... I'm not gorgeous, but neither am I ugly. I don't have Angelina Jolie sexy-momma body, but at least I still have a supermodel THIN body... hahahahhaa... ok ok.. maybe a little too thin, but who CARES?! I'm still blessed with...

a) wit (quick thinking & sharp brains)
b) charm (stunning personality)
c) sex appeal (... oh baby... yeah...)

... gosh... should I stop here before people slap my face?! errmmm.... NO! Be jealous all you want, but not many people are born with Wit, Charm and Sex Appeal.

You can be ugly, but if you have Wit, Charm & Sex Appeal... you can be Superman!!! SPIDERMAN!! BATMAN!!! WONDER WOMAN!!! And right now, I feel like Superman... but like my best friend's uncle said, "With great powers, come great responsiblities"... and it's so true, don't you think?

Becuz I know I'm great, but at the same time, I cannot abuse my powers. I have to use my Wit, Charm & Sex Appeal to save lives... or help people. For example:-

a. Using my Wit - to cheer people around me... or lighten a very angry situation...
b. Using my Charm - helping people to get MORE free stuff at stores... using it on my friends so that they will learn and use it on their loved ones, which will help strengthen their relationship...
c. Using my Sex Appeal - if (a) and (b) fails, then it's time to use plan (c)... hahaha... save till the last before I got no choice but to... *release the powerrrrrrrrrr!!!!!*...

Also, like how Superman is weak against Kryptonite. And Spiderman has a soft spot for Mary Jane. I also have my weakness... but... I will most definately NOT tell you!!!

And sometimes I wonder whether Superheros (like myself) will be surrounded by villians and fake friends... ... maybe people just want to be my friend becuz I have 3 very special powers... and bad people will be jealous of my powers too.

For all those people who took advantage of my kindness, this is what I have to say to you...

I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon
And I know it has to be something to do with you
I really don't mind... what happens now and then...
As long you'll be my friend at the end

You call me strong, you call me weak

But still your secrets I will keep
You took for granted for all the times that I never let you down
You stumbled in and bumped your head,
If it's not for me, then you'll be dead!
I picked you up & put you back on solid ground!

If I go crazy, then will you still call me Superman...
If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand?!
I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might!

... ... ok nvrmd... I'm really high on drugs today.... or maybe too much sugar...

Sunday, October 09, 2005


"When you're feeling trapped and the world doesn't stop to listen, you have nobody to talk to. You put it inside... you try to forget... but why does it get worse?"

Sometimes, I believe that certain things are better left unsaid. It's not that people should not talk about their feelings... but I'm thinking, "Why say it out when you know that the result will be even worse?"

So, we don't talk. But somehow, it feels bad... and you just feel this growing energy inside and you feel more and more frustrated. There has got to be some way to release that energy out to feel better, right??? RIGHT!!!

Ok... this is what the Bionic Woman (yes, that's me) does... and it may not be the BEST solution... but it's what I do... or DON'T do.



1. When you're feeling heartbroken, you must NEVER listen to sad love songs. It will only make you feel goddamn worse... and then you'll feel sorry for yourself. But not me. No no no... for me, I listen to EMINEM... yeah... that's the spirit... I listen to EMINEM... and I feel his anger... and when he talks about killing his ex-wife.. and raping his mother, I feel so much better... :O **oh gosh... that sounds so wrong**

2. When you're secretly in love with someone, don't just let it continue on. You're just going to feel terrible. So there's only 2 things that you can do... which is... (a) Tell the person... or (b) Let it go... ... ... hahahaha... good advice, right? For me, it is. And I choose (b). I'm not a brave person when it comes to confessing this kind of mushy mushy stuff... so I choose to let it go. Ask me to admit my mistake, I can still do it. But never ask me to say mushy stuff... ewwww... it's just NOT ME. So yeah... just let it go and move on!


1. Do something that will help you release all that emotional frustrations (eg: go gym, or kickboxing, etc). Yes yes... I go to the gym... (can hear some of you saying, "but you're sooooo thin already!"). Well... going to the gym can work out for different reasons mahhhhh... doesn't mean that it MUST be for slimming reasons. Or else... how did body builders get so big? Correct or not... hahahaha... I like going to the gym... it's a form of 'release' for me and on top of that, you also can get closer to a better-looking body.. hahahahahha... yah la yah la.. I'm vain. But seriously, sometimes, when I'm pissed at somebody... or when I'm feeling frustrated, I just feel like going out and start running VERY VERY VERY FAST... like I have to use up all that energy. Am I weird??? I dunno... but when I'm feeling angry or frustrated, I just feel like killing/beating/torturing something very badly... hahaha.. ok ok... dun be scared now, I'm not a psycho killer. Although I feel that my younger sister is scary (cuz she killed like... 8 hamsters), but I don't think the rest of my family members are born to kill.

2. Ok ok... I don't really encourage this Point #2, but I have to stress that this is what I do... and it doesn't mean that it the correct thing to do, ok?!?! Say OK!! Say it! Say it before you read further! ... *silence*... ok nvrmd... silence means consent. Ok. For me... I like piercings. I just feel that physical pain is so much better than emotional pain. And also, you have to spend time to take care of the wound... and when you're concentrating on making the wound better, you forget about feeling sad/angry. But this doesn't mean that I will go to the EXTREME... and pierce and pierce and pierce until I look like this:-

<--- ... holy mother of all nature... this is just some freaky shyte!!!





Saturday, October 08, 2005


So sweet... my dear friend, Annur, had sent me a birthday present!!! Allllll the way from Australia! She's actually the point #4 whom I had blogged about in my previous post - 1 DAY AFTER BIRTHDAY.

And the presents were INTERESTING!

Present #1

I like this... it's really cute! I'm going to name it... "Kangi". And I think I know why Annur would buy this for me. Because... ... it looks just like ME!!!

You see... Kangi and me have the same small head... hunchback... and big feet... hahahaha...

Present #2

This is like... my MOST FAVOURITE birthday card!!!

This birthday card is like a Truth or Dare game... which happens to be my FAVOURITE game too... .... oi.. don't look at me like that... it's a fun & interesting game and you know it, so don't deny it. And this card has moving lights when you press a button... COOL, RIGHT?!?!?!

So right now, I'm just going to play this game with the Devil.


Devil: Have you stolen anything?

Jeanie: *looks down ashamed*... yes...

Good job! *pats on Jeanie's back*...

Jeanie: :D ... cool!!

Devil: Now it's a DARE. I dare you to go up to a complete stranger & ask if he is wearing a wig.

Jeanie: ... err... ok... *goes up to stranger*... "are you wearing a wig? If you are... HOLY MOTHER OF ALL NATURE!!! It's LOOKS LIKE PUBIC HAIR, SIA!!!!!!"

Devil: EXCELLENT PERFECT!! I like the part where you added extra info on the pubic hair... HO HO HO... very funny... *grades Jeanie an A*... ok ok.. now question time... Have you ever farted in front of someone you are interested in?

Jeanie: YES!

Devil: Ok... that is so NOT cool... and it's gross too. I like mean people, but not disgusting faggots.

Jeanie: :(

Devil: Anywayz... Dare time. Strip to your underwear.

Jeanie: ... *strips to underwear*...

:O .... KANGI!!!

Jeanie: No... I'm JEANIE.

You ARE... you ARE Kangi... I recognize your small head, hunchback and big feet!

Jeanie: :O ... THAT'S IT!!! I had it with my small head, hunchback and big feet!! I have decided to... SELL MY SOUL TO THE DEVIL!!!

Uh huh... That's Me.

Jeanie: I will sell my soul... for WIT, CHARM & SEX APPEAL!!!!

Devil: Done.... *turns Jeanie into a FOUL MOUTH LITTLE BITCH*...

Jeanie: ... w... wat the... &^%*^@ !!!! You freakin LIAR!!! #*@^$*#!!!!

... hehehehehehhe.... *poof*... *disappears*...



And since that game with the Devil... things have never been the same for Jeanie Beanie the Weanie... no wonder Annur will also give me... ....

Present #3...

Friday, October 07, 2005

*wonder wonder*...

I read a book... and it says, "To have a fulfilling and healthy relationship, we must first be comfortable with ourselves & not be afraid of loneliness."

Sometimes, I wonder... why do we feel lonely? Why do we miss people? Is it becuz they are not around... or is it becuz you NEED them to be around?

I used to miss my ex-bf... but then I realized that I only miss him out of habit... becuz I was too used to having him around and it just feels weird that he is gone from my life.

When I was attached, I used to miss being alone. But now that I am single, I miss having someone around.. :-/

So I wonder... when people feel attracted to each other... do they actually stop to think, "what kind of person am I? Am I afraid of loneliness? Or am I ready to have a fulfilling and healthy relationship?"

I mean... what I had read in the book is rather true... but seriously, in real life... WHO THE HELL ACTUALLY CARES?!?!?!

Question: -- If you just broken up with your gf / bf... and you're feeling depressed and lonely... and here comes another girl / guy who seems so sweet and loving and is available to cure your loneliness, do you think you will pause and think to yourself, "Am I ready for another relationship? Am I going on the rebound? Will I end up hurting her / him??"

Well... everybody likes to have somebody who will shower them with love and affections and attention. Soon, we will feel like we have fallen in love with that person. BUT... is it really LOVE??? Or is it just becuz you like the attention? Is it just becuz you're touched by their actions?

Until now, I don't even know the answer.

But I do believe one thing...

If you love a person and somehow you have managed to do something to make that person fall in love with you... well... don't stop doing it.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005


After work, I was having dinner with a close friend of mine - Carol. We were talking about the past... and she was talking about some people and I was like, "who's that?"... Then my friend was looking at me and said, "don't tell me you have forgotten who they are... wahhh.. you really very forgetful, man".

... well, it's well-known that I'm forgetful... and I don't remember things in the past... but to forgot my ex-bf's name??? errmmm.... I do think I have a problem...

Anyway, on that very night... I was getting ready for bed and I was thinking about this. I was wondering, "how can I actually forget my ex-bf's name???" And I tried to remember some of my past... my ex-bfs... and why we broke up... but it's really not coming back to me. It's like... the memories are GONE... it's LOST. Or is it because I am transforming into... BIONIC WOMAN???

**editor's note: why Bionic Woman?.. i dunno.. maybe you can read my previous post to understand this better...

So what is going on?? I really want to know if other people have this problem too.

Oh... I remembered another thing... Carol had said, "you're really forgetful leh. For me, I can remember everything... maybe that's why I bear grudges".


So THAT'S why I never bear grudges... well, I can remember wat kind of arguements I was having... but maybe it's becuz I just CANNOT REMEMBER how angry/hurt I had felt at that time of arguing... :-/

So THAT'S why I'm QUICK-tempered, but not HOT-tempered.... becuz my temper comes quickly and goes away quickly too... and soon, I will forget that I was angry with that person... and then everybody will start laughing and playing again.

... wow... I'm like... the WORLD'S MOST FORGIVING PERSON... and it's becuz I'm also the WORLD'S MOST FORGETFUL PERSON... ... so.. is it supposed to be a good thing or a bad thing? Well... for all the things that I have mentioned, it might be a good thing...

BUT.... it also means that without constant reminding, I might forget you. Well, not EVERYBODY... becuz there are a few people whom I can remember for life. But there are other people, whom I will forget... I forget their names... forget how I knew them.... forget that we used to go out and play together.

... Perhaps this is why my ex-bf will say that I need constant attention... ahhahaha... becuz I need to be constantly reminded that he still likes me... or else I'll forget why I'm with him.


Monday, October 03, 2005


When I was taking a shower earlier on, I remembered an outing with my 2 friends (John & Melson). We were at East Coast McCafe and a friend of mine sms'ed me. As I was replying to the sms, John & Melson were like, "Who's that?" And I replied, "oh, it's Dex".

...*moment of silence*... ...

And... John started laughing.

So, I was like... "wat wat wat? Wat's so funny???"

Then John said, "THAT'S Dex".

Strangely, we all found it funny (dun ask me why)... and were laughing and laughing.

Then... *another moment of silence*...

And Mel said, "That's Dex DESK"

And we all started laughing again...

... and you'll think that it will be over... but nooooooooooooo... John started laughing and laughing again... and he said, "That's Dex's DAD'S desk!"...

... ahhahahahhaa... and then we were trying to say it 3 times fast... hahahaha...

Ok ok... it's lame, I know... but it was FUNNY at that time... hahahaahaha... sigh... weird friends I have... ... and it all started with...

"Who's that?"

"Oh, it's Dex"...

Sunday, October 02, 2005


Well... I think my birthday went rather well last night. I went out with my best friend... for dinner and movies. He drove his new car (altho I don't understand why he keeps talking to it)... hahaha... but it was TOO FUN! Until when I sleep at night, I feel like my face is so sore from laughing.

And I even put on some make-up (and note that I don't usually put make-up cuz I'm too lazy to wash it off)... ... maybe that's why I ended up looking like... ....

<--- Ju-On... ... and yeah yeah... go on.. you know you want to call me panda... or bug-eyes... or one-big-one-small eyes... ... hahahaha...

... ... but... maybe it wasn't so bad... becuz when I stepped out in public, nobody died in fright. And I was going to post a nice picture of me and my friend, but for SOME REASONS... well... I didn't... cuz we didn't take a perfect picture... hahahaa... it's either "oh my face looks so oily"... or "eee.. my eyes look weird lor"... or "bleah... face looks fat"... or "NO my lips look thick"... or "my teeth looks so protuding"... ahhaha... and mostly, the complains didn't come from ME... hahhhahhaa... you will think that we're 2 silly little girls... but really... my friend is a man... which reminds me of my previous post - "GIRLY MAN, MANLY WOMAN". Anywayz, I already PROMISED him that I will not post his pictures... so... now it's just full of me... ahhahahaha...

But despite my Ju-On'ness... this was taken before we went home.

<--- come on la... it's not that bad, right?! give me some credit, k?? It was already 3am!

On a more serious note... I did miss a few people on my birthday. Not that I'm complaining that my best friend is boring... I mean... he is just the absolute fun & crazy person to be with. But I thought about other people as well... and... HECK LA... I'm just going to list down my thank-you's... you know... like for memorial's sake...

<1> My 大哥大... hahaha.. thank you for spending time with me on my birthday... life will be so incomplete without you. Thank you for being there when it matters the most... and you will always give me hope that men CAN BE RESPONSIBLE!!! Thank you for being my friend for practically half my life... we have grown up together... and we know each other too well... and all our karaoke sessions were DAMN CRAZY... (can hear you going, "boooooooooooooooooo" already... well... BOO back to you too, man!)... hahahahaha!!!

<2> The person who treats me like 妹妹... who makes me laugh when I'm down... who can talk about EVERYTHING and ANYTHING with me... who laughs at my silly goofy jokes... but can also make me pissed with his PMS tantrums... worse than girl, sia!!! (again, pls see my previous post of GIRLY MAN, MANLY WOMAN).. but thank you for making my life more colourful. And.... *Deuce Bigalow voice*... "you can DO IT!!!"... hahaha...

<3> The person who keeps me company in MSN when I'm bored... and says funny things to make me laugh at the monitor (until my mother call me SIAO AH)... and who tries his best to cheer me up... and is so very SWEET!!! Now everytime when I think about him, he makes me smile... cuz he makes me feel so lucky to have such a terrific friend like him. And I just know that he deserves the World's Best Girlfriend. This guy also remembers EVERYTHING... the first time we played in an online game... the promises he gives... the things that was said in the past... he just has MEGA-MEMORY. Maybe that's why he got into the Science class... and I'm in Arts... :-/

<4> I miss this person terribly. She was so helpful and sweet during my poly years... and we just grew closer to each other. She really did fool me with her sweet innocent charm and MICKEY MOUSE voice (hahahaha), I was totally surprised when she can actually talk about the most outrageous things and laugh at my 'yellow yellow dirty fellow' jokes! I still see her on MSN... but too bad... she's SO FAR AWAY and cannot just FLY back on my birthday... but yes... I miss her very much... *wipes a tear from the corner of my eyes*... and you know what? Sometimes, we will just talk about nonsense stuff and she will just say something... that will inspire me to have one of my weird theories about life. Woman, you are my INSPIRATION!!!

Well... The End.

*sob*... goodbye 25... hello 26...

Today is my 26th birthday... the long dreaded day. I realized that I have been waiting all my teenage life to turn 21... so I can watch RA movies (officially). But the minute I turned 21, I realized that I'll probably be waiting all my life to turn 18.... :-/

And I don't understand what's there to celebrate about... and what's there to be joyous about?? It's just one more step closer to the grave... one more wrinkle contributed to your age... one notch closer to saggy skin...

Am I afraid of getting old? YES.
Am I vain? SO VERY YES!

You know what?? I'm actually a single eyelid person... and as narcissistic as I may sound, I think I look pretty good with single eyelids lorrrrrrrrr. However, every since my age started creeping closer to 30, I realized that I'm turning into a DOUBLE eyelid person... *THE HORRORS*!!! And also, do I sense my cheeks getting droopy'er... or am I just paranoid?!?!?!

Moreover, I just had a recent break-up. And my mother has been starting to get worried about me... still unmarried at 26... and not only still unmarried... somemore still single... hahahaahaha... (and when your mother starts to worry about this, you WILL know that you're getting OLDER... dear god).

Call me a tough cookie, but I have told my mother before... that I will rather be unmarried than marry the wrong man. Uh huh... no rushing into anything that I will regret in later life.

Well... ... SORRY if I don't grovel at men's feet... and SORRY that I'm not that little mousy woman who lets men order me around... ... I have more DIGNITY and PRIDE than that. I may be (almost) old, grey and wrinkled, but SORRY that I feel that being on my own is better than having a troublesome man beside me.

I do admit that at times like this (birthdays, valentine's day, christmas, and other shitty happy holidays), I do feel like something is missing. Although I have lots of true friends, whom I love to death and have too much fun with... it's just feels like... something is missing. Aiya... I dunno how to explain this la. But basically, my point is... why bother keeping a man who makes you worry... and makes you angry... and does all the un-boyfriendly things?? Correct or not??? ... ... aiya... no need to pause and think lah... it's of course correct lah!!!

So, maybe I'm one year older... but I am definately 365 days wiser. I'm not that little young girl who smiles easily when guys shower attention. I'm not that ignorant little girl who can't see evil and nice. And I'm no longer that fragile little girl who worries where her man has been.

Call me arrogant. But I didn't waste and rot away the past 25 years of my life. I moulded myself into... BIONIC WOMAN!!!! *ta ta ta taaaaa*... Every year, I change a part of me that I didn't like... and I turn it into something better. Bad temper in the past? Now, I have higher tolerance of people. Cold & Aloof? Now I'm attentive. Bad grades in secondary school? Well, check out my flying colours in ITE and Poly. My boss tells me that I have to be more careful in my work? Roger that. Now, I'm 98% accurate.

Am I a perfectionist by nature? Of course.

I believe that this must be the actual reason why people should be happy when they celebrate birthdays. It's becuz every year, they know that they have improved themselves in a certain way... and have not walked around aimlessly as years pass them by. They celebrate becuz they are getting BETTER every year. And THAT is exactly what you should be happy about during your birthdays.

For me... well... I just don't intend to rot my life away by being an imperfect human being. So yeah... as I lay in bed today and am feeling depressed about my age, I thought to myself, "wat have I done the past year from 25 to 26?" Well... I've proven that I'm the best employee you can ever have. And I have made that effort to spend lots of time with my family (very sorry I have neglected you guys all these years), and now, we're practically friends.

And yes... I should be happy on my birthday. I've not wasted my life away.