Thursday, November 30, 2006

Essential Skills




I was watching the series - Supernatural of Season 1 - tonight.

The actors were Jared Padalecki & Jensen Ackles.



But as I was sitting there & staring at my 32-inch LCD TV (soon to be 40-inch), I really wonder how do these guys kick open solid wood/metal in one swift hard bang.

It's like....


Door bolted shut?
NOT A PROBLEM! *kicks*... *door burst wide open*...

Gate chained tightly? NEVER MIND! *kicks*... *metal chains around gate breaks open*...




Wow.

Where do these guys go for their kick-open-anything moves?

I sure want to enroll for these classes too.

Then I won't have to worry about forgetting to bring my office/home keys.




Partied way too late one night & your parents bolted the door to keep you out? NOT A PROBLEM! *kicks*... *door burst wide open*...

Arrived at the office & realized that you forgot your keys? NEVER MIND! *kicks*... *door flies out from its hinges*...

Came home one day to surprise your spouse and realized that he/she is having fun with someone else? UNLEASH THE DEMON! *kicks*... *twists the neck in odd & unnatural ways*...





See?

This kind of aggressive kicking is a very important skill in everybody's life.

Probably good to get insurance as well. The impact on the knee must be really bad.

Friday, November 24, 2006

A Funny Line




A snippet of an imaginary conversation inspired by true-life accounts.


Cutie:
OH MY GOD!!!
You're lusting after Chee By Lan, but infactuated with Super Cute Boy?!?!
... ...
... ...
... ...
can I slap you?!?!



Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Something Sweet





I know.

It is so NOT me to actually appreciate something sweet.

Maybe it's the air in Jurong (where I work) that puts me in a soft, tender and vulnerable mood.

I HATE FEELING VULNERABLE!!! But yet, it's nice at the same time. NO I HAVE TO BE STRONG. Or not. WAT AM I TALKING ABOUT?! It's ok to indulge in sweetness once in a while. NO IT'S NOT! Just calm down. ARGH!!!




Or it could be that my period just ended, so I have officially bounced back into a lovable mood.

Or it could be that I have met up with my friend who came back from Brisbane and she gave me some really WONDERFUL TOYS.


And boy did my family enjoy the toys...


I shall let the pictures do the talking...

Alvin has a serious sinus problem that actually infected his right forehead which causes severe headache. Therefore, he found a really good use for the vibrating toy... (pls see picture below).






Gina has never seen anything like this before... and so, she is traumatized by its size... (pls also see picture below).






I don't even want to get started on what our daddy demostrated with the toy (although now Gina and I know where we get our bisexual tendencies from).

Mummy boasted that her toy is better than mine becuz hers is of a better material and it's skin-coloured and has balls. But I argued that PINK is the in-colour this season and who the hell cares if the toy has balls or not!!!


Well, my friend got me TWO of the same kind.

Who wants one?

... yes... i'm going giving out one... becuz i'm giving one to my brother for his severe headache... HAHA!


The other one is still unused... ... cuz no way in hell am I going to use it on myself.

It's unhumanly huge.

Monday, November 20, 2006

The Misconception





Everywhere I go, people seem to have this one big misconception about me.


... which is...


I am anorexic.



HELLO?!?!

What do you mean I'm ANOREXIC???

It's not ME being anorexic, it's just YOU being obese!



Besides, I prefer the term... ...

Proportionately Skinny


or maybe, I also can settle for... ...

Model Thin




It's not like I have a huge head and stick-like body.

And when I'm undressed, you can't see my ribs.

Plus, anorexic girls will never in their lives, have a great ass (such as mine).

Ok ok, so I have a small chest. But wat I lack in that department, I make it up with my other delicious bits... hahahahahahahahahaaha!!!

... oh my god, i can't believe i just said that...



I always tell my sister that she should NEVER let people bring her down. I mean, why should she wear ugly baggy clothes, just to hide her slim taut body?

There was this one person who actually said to my sister,

"you look like you have been starving since you were born"



And immediately, I just had this impression that this person is FAT.

So I asked my sister, "who is it? i bet she's fat".

Well, she never told me who the person was, but she did say that this person weighs like 200 pounds.

Ooooooo... kay. Enough said.




When I was much younger, I used to let comments like these bring me down too. And then I'll get depressed for a little while, wondering why do I have to be skinny and no matter how much I eat, I hardly put on the pounds.

But there was one day, when I was kinda complaining that I need to put on weight, and this guy friend of mine actually shook me... ... and then, he said the most inspiring words to me,

"The world is a funny place.
Everyone is desperately trying to lose weight to look like you,
and you're trying to put on weight to look like them!"





Also, my brother once said to me,

"It works like maths.
Everything is about relativity.
If most people are fat, they'll call you skinny.
But if one day, most people are thin, they'll call you fat even when you are of normal weight.
And too bad for you, cuz the world is mostly made up of fat people."





Hmmmmm...

Wise words of wisdom.




But I guess the bottom line is... that we should all be comfortable with who we are and what we look like.

People who criticise you for being fat / skinny / pimply / stubby / flabby / boney, are actually people who have really bad characters... .. and they reflect very badly on themselves. People who try and bring you down are people who are insecure themselves. Therefore, we should pity these people, instead of getting mad at them for trying to bring you down.



Sure, we indulge in the occasional fat / skinny jokes at times.

But telling people that they are replusively skinny in their faces and in that dead serious tone, is seriously NOT COOL at all.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

A Bigger Twinkle Lambabo




Remember my previous post on Twinkle getting fatter? You can read it HERE . Now here is the evidence of him growing so much bigger!!

I have to remind myself that I got him on 31 Oct. And he was not even 2 months old.

Today, is 19 Nov, and I have just taken pictures of his cute bigger self.





Remember this pic?

This was taken when he was first brought into the house. He's so small and furry and cute!!!




Now, the picture below was taken today.


SEE HOW MUCH MY LITTLE TWINKLE HAS GROWN????

I'm telling you, he has built rabbit muscles on top of rabbit muscles!

We gave him such a large place to hop around in our house that he has became the bold, active and strong little bunny!!!



He's still very adorable. You should see how he looks up at you when he wants to play... and you should see how he asks for food when his food bowl is empty!!!





ULTIMATE CUTE'NESS!!!





Here are more pictures of Mr Lambabo:

Twinkle loves chilling on the cold floor...




Twinkle getting comfy... and sleepy...




... zzzzzzzZZZZzzzzzz...




... in REM...




Sometimes, I look at Twinkle. And he reminds me of a little puppy dog. He is so adorable... ... I want to lick him!!! And his fur is so soft and fine and (after his bath) he smells SOOOO GOOD!




On another topic (actually it's still about Twinkle, just that it's another different chapter)...


Alvin (my brother) and I had this MSN conversation over the sex of Twinkle.

I was at work. And he was at home.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me: I still don't know if Twinkle is male or female... although I think I see a pee pee just beneath the tail.

Alvin: Pee Pee = Male.

Me: But there's only the pee pee and no balls.

Alvin: Ok. Now that's disturbing. Maybe the hormones hasn't made the balls fall out yet.

Me: ... woot?!?!?!?!

Alvin: Or maybe you can flick it and see how high Twinkle jumps.

Me: hahahahaha... I have a better and painless idea. Why don't you lick it?

Alvin: I would. But if Twinkle is male, I'll just feel dumb.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

My brother is a funny guy.

He can entertain the world with his incredibly witty perverted mind.


Well... that's all folks.

I'll keep you updated once I can finally determine Twinkle's sex.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Short Sweet Message to THE RETARDED ONE




Dear Rozita,


You have started to bore us. And I have, therefore, put an authorization on my Haloscan due to overwhelming response by your obsession towards me & my fabulous blog.

Besides, your tricks are getting old and unoriginal. Previously, I have let you stay becuz at least you put up a relatively good fight. But now, you're just lame lame lame.

Typing in comments and signing off as Palliative Drug.

Spamming as Mr Mink.

To top it all, you even left a comment saying, "Happy scanning thru the spams and the real comments". And then you went ahead and create more spam.

My pathetic little retardo, haven't you realize how USER-FRIENDLY Haloscan is? It's just a click of a button to delete all those spams.

hahahaha...

Get a life.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

TWINKLE LAMBABO








I had so much trouble trying to think of a name for my baby rabbit. But finally, I have decided to give him a really cool name.

Bought him on Halloween Day 2006!!! And from that day, it shall be his unofficial official birthday. He was not even 2 months old when I saved him from that pet shop and into my warm and loving arms.

He's so cute & adorable... and the tiniest thing I had ever since. He actually fits in my palm!





Here are some of his pictures on the first day!!! He's so tiny and adorable and furry!!!











Even my brother with the serious sinus problem loves Mr Lambabo!

Alvin says, "he's cute and in the mafia"





But alas, just after SIX DAYS in my house, Twinkle Lambabo has grown and grown and grown and grown.

My sister told me, "he's getting fat".



So, I looked at him...



And I picked him up...



And I felt his stomach area...





THE HORRORS!!!





He no longer fits snugly in my palm... cuz his tummy is TOO BIG and thus, can no longer curl into a nice little round ball.




(O_O) !!!!



HOLY MOTHER OF ALL NATURE!!!



WHAT HAVE WE DONE?!?!



We have lovingly and unknowingly turned Twinkle Lambabo into Thumper Fattaso!!!




Finally, on the 11th day, I decided to put Twinkle on a strict diet... ... cuz no way in hell am I going to have a seriously obese rabbit (and he's not even 2 months old).

Therefore, before I stepped out of the house at 6.45am in the morning (which is today), I wrote a note for the whole family:






It is indeed cruelty to extremely adorable baby rabbits... ...

... but Twinkle, you know this is for your own good. I'm thinking for your future, just in case you meet a lovely girl and decided to have a family with her. You don't want her to reject you becuz of your obesity... ... ... ... ... besides, it's hard to hump when you got a huge tummy...





But then again, I still do not know if Twinkle is a male or female.

We can't see his pee pee yet.








But Alvin said that the baby rabbit looks shuai (handsome) and not chio (pretty).

I think Twinkle is a male too... cuz he has a roundish face. Female animals usually have a more pointy and sharp look.



Anywayz, here's a video of Twinkle Lambabo grooming himself. And when anyone just shows him some love, he just lies there on the floor to enjoy it. He's SO goddamn cute!!!




Friday, November 10, 2006

Game Over
&
Back to Hibernation





Cast the mindless catfights aside.

The game is over.

I'm bored.

Anybody else want to make me another bet?



After all the insults and vulgarities spewed out from my small & kissable lips, I feel it's also time for me to go back into a nice & quiet hibernation.

Why must ppl always push me into being a Big Bad Wolf, when all I ever wanted was to be The Little Mermaid?




I BLAME YOU





Life is as cruel as it gets.

I knew somebody dropped me on the head the second I was born.

... probably too jealous cuz i was such a pretty little babe...

My mummy told me that when I was a baby, I would sleep and wake up and just NOT cry for milk or attention. Instead, I would just wake up in the middle of the night and stare at the ceiling... as if I was deep in thoughts.

... thus, she got so paranoid that she couldn't sleep the whole night cuz she thought her precious little baby girl had quietly passed away in her sleep...



I guess by now, I would have figured that all those thinking was for being...


THE WORLD'S MOST PERFECT LADY




Throughout primary school, I was such a timid and nice little girl and always trying to please everyone.

But at age 12, I tasted first-hand betrayal. Still, being the innocent and gullible person, I continue to remain pure and polite.

Due to lack of guidance, I got into a bad-ass secondary school where gangsters tormented the teachers and the teachers vented their frustrations on the weaker students.

I especially hated this maths teacher who picked on me. Everyone could tell the difference in her harsh tone towards me and the other kids. And all those punishments were unneccessary.

That really did it for me.

Good thing, I got myself a bunch of kick-ass friends who stood by me when the going gets rough. One thing for sure, she will never dare to drive her car to school anymore. And no more problems for me ever since.

I tried to play nice, I failed.

Never will I make the same mistake again.



Sad to say...

ONLY THE FITTEST WILL SURVIVE






Now, what brings me to blog about this today?

I was out for dinner with my friend yesterday and we saw a small boy getting bullied by a group of older kids.

Like the chinese always say, "There is always a mountain bigger than the previous one".

They may be bullies, but they are always no match for the old timers.



I'm sick of this world.

I'm bored and I'm tired.

I never knew being mean can be this tiring.

Time to find me a place to hibernate and meditate.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

I AM ALMIGHTY





About two and a half months ago, I was chatting with my friend on MSN.

Mr Mink told me that I have a funny & interesting blog.

I told him I'm getting old and I'm getting boring and soon, nobody will read my blog.




He said, "everybody reads your blog".

I said, "ya.. they all secretly read it like you, but nobody leaves any comments".

He replied, "no comments = good... at least you're not getting hate mails".

I said, "my life is boring.. hate mails make life interesting".

He told me, "nobody will leave nasty comments in your blog... you are not Xiaxue".

Me, "WOOT?!?! But I'm cuter than her... i deserve to have hate mails"

He said, "not exactly cuter"

I said, "FINE... well, at least I'm taller and leaner..."

He replied, "that is not what I meant... was about to say that you're not exactly cuter, but more charming"

I said, "CHARMING?! Then I'll get lesbian mails... and that is so not cool (though girls are sexy and fun)"

He asked, "what's with you & hate mails?! is it the IN THING now???"




Somehow the conversation led to a bet.



The Bet
For someone to leave me a slightly nasty/rude comment.
And then rebutt me back 3 times.

The Rules
I cannot be purposely irritating in my blog.
And I have to blog as normal.

The Deadline
3 months starting from 21 August 2006.

The Reward
If I succeed, I get 5 free Gold Class movie experiences.
Plus a high-class dinner at Westin Stamford.
And party all night with no extra charge for drinks.

The Punishment
If I fail, I have to clean up Mr Mink's house (and believe me when I say it's a BIG place to clean... i will probably not walk straight for the next few WEEKS).




So I blogged.

And I blogged.

And I blogged some more.

I tried to be mean... and arrogant... and bitchy... and boy-crazy...

But nothing.

Nobody bothered to say anything remotely irritating to me.

Then I decided to blog about something sad and depressed.

And here comes Rozita.




For this, I thanked the heavens above for blessing me.

Now, let's count my wins.




The Achieved Bet

The 1st and slightly nasty/rude comment:

"but sometimes, it's pot calling the kettle black. are you sure you've never done those things you mentioned to your friends? and are you sure they're the ones who did all that to you? everyone has their insensitive moments. like for example, maybe you forget people's birthdays and you expect them to remember yours. sure, they may remember for a few years, always wishing you without fail. but after that, when their kindness are not recipocrated, they just stop altogether. can you blame them? or have you been unforgiving towards others before? never?we should always reflect upon ourselves, no matter how difficult it is to face our own shortcomings. i don't claim i've never hurt my friends, or that they do 100 nice things for me and i never bear grudge for that one mistake. i do too. so, maybe you have, just that you don't want to admit?"



Ok... I think this is like... reasonably nasty/rude enough.

So I wrote an angry blog back to DEAR ROZITA.



The 3-time rebutted comments by Rozita:

1st Rebuttal:
"you must do better in judging people because there are two things you've judged wrongly about me. first, i studied until polytechnic with a diploma in hospitality management. so i'm not sure if it's considered 'stopped schooling at a young age'. and, i'm not the youngest, neither am i the only child. i have an older brother and a younger sister. as for whether people remember my birthday, all i can say is, some do. but most do not. but that's not the issue here. maybe i deem that forgetting people's birthdays is a very insensitive thing to do. but the reason why i'm saying all those is i'm just speaking from my own experience. i chanced upon your blog and i must say i'm very suprised some people can actually lament that why certain people can do certain things to people. you may have started the entry saying you're not a saint and you do wrong things. but the rest of the entry is mere accusations. anyway, your blog is only one that i chanced upon, you don't have to react so strongly. i'm not trying to say what kind of person you are, i'm just speaking my own experience as well as some that my friends have gone through. and if you say i judge people i don't know, all i can say is, i don't. just that when you read about what people write in blogs, you will give your two cents worth or opinion. alot of people have comments like that. but i'm sorry you don't appreciate them and be so defensive. bye bye!"

(did she say that I just blogged a whole lot of MERE ACCUSATIONS??? I take that as a rebutt. Thank god for that cuz she was so mildly polite.)


2nd Rebuttal:
"BITCH."

(wow... short & sweet... i like that. My 2nd short sweet victory. Now just ONE MORE and I win.)


3rd Rebuttal:
"i would piss on your FACE if i can, not just in your place. boy, you've got such a super big arsehole that a dog would feel ashamed to fuck you. and i can pretty much say what i want too. bratty little bitch eh? you put up a good fight yourself.want my email? sure. it's jeaniefuckmydog@hotmail.com. would be happy to hear from you, motherfucker."

(shit man... this whole paragraph was such a turn on that I just had to enlarge the font size and highlight the whole damn thing... ... damn, this hot mama got the FIRE in her! YEAH BABY YEAH! She just fired my way up to a victory!!!)






Suddenly the skies are clearer... and the air is fresher... and the clouds are fluffier...


But alas, the fun has to end (and just when it's starting to get interesting).

Like I said in my previous post about my win on the FREE Cathay Cineleisure tickets to Material Girls, the fun is only in the challenge and not the prize itself.



And yes, I am almighty.

*waves the wave of Beauty Queens*

Monday, November 06, 2006

Dear Rozita
(pls note that I have given you a really big blog title, just cuz you're so special to me)





Thank you for leaving a comment in my previous blog entry (pls click HERE to read it). You have definately brought a whole new meaning to my life. I've always liked to have readers from all walks from life.

Here is what you wrote in your comment:

"but sometimes, it's pot calling the kettle black. are you sure you've never done those things you mentioned to your friends? and are you sure they're the ones who did all that to you? everyone has their insensitive moments. like for example, maybe you forget people's birthdays and you expect them to remember yours. sure, they may remember for a few years, always wishing you without fail. but after that, when their kindness are not recipocrated, they just stop altogether. can you blame them? or have you been unforgiving towards others before? never?we should always reflect upon ourselves, no matter how difficult it is to face our own shortcomings. i don't claim i've never hurt my friends, or that they do 100 nice things for me and i never bear grudge for that one mistake. i do too. so, maybe you have, just that you don't want to admit?"




Sorry to disappoint, Rozita.

But it is true that I have never beared a grudge (please ask those people who actually KNOW me MUCH better than you).

And for you to judge me before even knowing me, only proves how childish you really are... ... ... or maybe you DO know me (as an acquaintance, of course... becuz I have absolute trust in MY own friends that they will never say this to me... BECUZ they actually UNDERSTAND me), but is just too afraid to leave your REAL name... ... but it's ok, cuz this tells me that you are secretly JEALOUS of me... ... or maybe it's a cry for attention. That's ok... becuz here I am to give you ALL THE ATTENTION THAT YOU NEED!


WELCOME TO MY BLOG!!!
... where attention is given to all those who needs it really badly like a baby needing milk...




In case you haven't been reading my blog PROPERLY before you're oh-so-quick to judge, please read the BEGINNING of the entry where I have said (here, let me HIGHLIGHT the important parts for you, so that you don't absent-mindedly brush past the GOOD stuff and only read the BAD stuff again),

"I'm not saying that I'm a saint. I know I have my own temper. I'm only human. But after I cool down, I always set things right again... becuz I will always remember the good times I've had with a person. And I tell myself that I know I love them still."





So don't say that I have claimed that I never hurt my friends / family... becuz I already admitted that I'm not a saint. The only difference is that I reflect upon myself and if it's my mistake, I will make things right for everyone again. And then, to forgive and forget and never bringing up the argument again.

I'm sorry you probably had a bad day today, so you feel the need to take it out on someone you DON'T KNOW. Or then again, maybe you're just so jealous of me becuz I actually have buddies who stick by my side like (let's do that in alphabetical order)... ALVIN (my blood-related brother), ANNUR, GINA (my blood-related sista), JOHN and MINK.

And then, there are other people who are actually cool with me like... CAT, GRACE, GWEN and WENN.



But that's ok. Cuz I forgive you for your insensitive childish outbursts.

Let this big sista teach you a thing or two about outbursts (trust me when I say that I'm speaking from experience). Sometimes, you have to think twice before actually HAVING an outburst... ... cuz if it is insensitive and childish, then in the end, it's only going to turn around and bite you in the butt and you're only going to embarrass yourself just cuz you didn't have a credible mature outburst.



And I'm not even going to delete your comment becuz you are actually going to teach the world how to be a better person and how to have a proper outburst!

Wow... look at all the attention you're getting now!

Your comment goes to show exactly what a terrible character you have. So now, others will think twice before they say something that is childish & illogical and they will now read blog entries more carefully.

I wonder if you had been terrible at English Comprehension.

PLUS, you have just proven that what I had written on my blog is true. You only see the present and you don't care about what good the person has done in the past.

Besides (in case your comprehension skills are really damn bloody lousy), let me just EXPLAIN to you that the underlying meaning for this blog entry is for people (like little Rozita) to LEARN how to appreciate others better instead of being selfish and only thinking for yourself.

I feel so much pity for you. But at the same time, you intrigue me. Let's play a guessing game... just cuz you're so mysterious. Let us just picture what kind of life you have...




orhmmmmmmmmmmm...




You have little or no friends at all. This either means that you're disgustingly anti-social or you are just too irritating to be with. I'm guessing you can't hold your tongue and you come across as a really rude person. I mean, come on... who actually leaves a comment like that in blogs when they don't even know the person well? Well, only a really RUDE person does that.

Nobody wants to talk to you, except when they need help. That's basically becuz you tend to come across as a bitchy rude person.

You probably try to make yourself feel very interesting or popular by taking up a hobby and then being very good at it, so that people can admire you and come talk to you and get advice. Well, Rozita... ... anything that works for you.

You like to be in control and everybody must listen to you or else you'll throw a hissy pissy fit. I'm guessing you also like to tell people that they are wrong, so that you feel more superior then them. Hmmm... if this is the case, then I'm guessing you have stopped schooling at a young age, so you tend to develop this kind of character. This probably shows that you are subconsciously insecure of yourself... ... which in turn, made you wanna take up a hobby and be good at it and show others that you're good at it.

You're a selfish spoilt brat and you have actually been told that you are a selfish spoilt brat by others before, but you refuse to change. Or maybe you have changed, but have developed other problematic behaviours. I'm thinking you're either the youngest in the family... or you're the only child.

Sometimes, you lie in bed and you wonder why nobody remembers your birthday. Well, just get over yourself already!!! People forget people... that's the nature of life, okay?! What matters is that the people you care about remember yours.




Damn.

Now that was fun.

I've always wanted to be a psychologist or something. I guess I can be judgemental too. But then again, it's not called judgemental, if others judge you unfairly and piss you off... ... then I guess I'm entitled to do a little bitchin on my side. Besides, Rozita, you don't mean nothing to me, so don't expect an apology from me.

However, I should thank you.

I've been having a writer's block and couldn't think of anything to blog about. Then you came along and brightened my day.




By the way, if you have the guts to judge people you don't know, why don't you have the guts to leave your URL or email?

At least we could get to know each other better.

You can then learn if I'm really a 'pot calling the kettle black'... ... and I can find out if you're really an insecure rude little brat.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Man VS Animals

(disclaimer: I am not referring to ALL of mankind, but of the 90% black sheeps who tainted the world with their cold unfeeling hearts.)





The 'Man' here does not refer to the gender, but is referring to human beings themselves.

It is a sad fact that humans are known to hurt each other just cuz they can. It's funny how an intelligent species like Man can actually behave in a way that cannot even be compared to an animal.

I'm not saying that I'm a saint.

I know I have my own temper. I'm only human.

But after I cool down, I always set things right again... becuz I will always remember the good times I've had with a person. And I tell myself that I know I love them still.

However, the same cannot be expressed to the rest of my species.

Sometimes, I am so puzzled why certain person can do certain things to hurt other people (for eg: give dented expired canned food to others, or fight over family inheritances, or spit in people's faces).





For example:

You can do 100 nice things for a person, but the minute you do 1 thing that the person doesn't like, the 100 nice things are immediately forgotten. And I'm not even saying that the 1 thing is the WRONG thing. It's just something that the person doesn't like.

So, this is what it means to feel unappreciated and forgotten.

This is what it feels when you feel like all your genuine kindness has gone to waste on that unappreciative person. And it only takes 5 seconds to feel the lost of hope & happiness.

Then it doesn't matter how much you dote on a person, but the minute you're in trouble, the person takes sides and shows that she is silently PLEASED that you are in deep shit.

And another person just adds oil to the fire.

All of them are just DYING to see you in deep shit.

Fark it.

I don't even need the support.

I don't understand why I can always give in so much, but the others just take advantage of my kindness. They just show their tempers whenever they pleased, whereas I have to just grit and bear and act like everything is cool.

Everything I do is just NOT ENOUGH.

After 27 years, I should have just accepted the fact that I should just GIVE UP. Just give up on treating these people nicely.

When they are feeling down, I comfort them.

When they need someone to talk to, I am there.

When people argue, I try to sort things out between them.

When I have extra cash, I bring them out for dinner just cuz I know they like the food.

But when you need them, where the hell are they?

They are only too excited to watch you DIE a cold terrible death. They have forgotten what you have done for them. This just proves how much they are cold-hearted and not worthy of living.

And I just stupidly love them everyday and take all the abuse.





Animals, on the other hand, give you so much more rewards.

You love them and take care of them.

They get attached to you and will love you back no matter what.

They don't habour evil thoughts. They don't make use of you. They just innocently love you till the day you die.

Animals actually APPRECIATE your love and kindness.

And when you're feeling down, it's always nice to have your pet lay down beside you.

Heck... ... even its presence is enough to keep you comforted throughout the night.




A friend of mine, who has pets of his own, once said to me...

"It is always nice to know that you have someone at home waiting patiently for you. And you know that you have someone who appreciates and loves you no matter what. You can never get this kind of innocent feelings with another human being."





How true it is.

Only my friends will understand what I am going through.

Only they will know why I needed my little Twinkle to comfort me.

Only my friends are there for me.

They accept and appreciate me, just like how I love them for their kindness and good-nature. It is funny how you get your support from outsiders, rather than from blood.




One true incident:

I was feeling depressed.

I was home all week.

Nobody noticed what was wrong.

One night, I couldn't take the voices in my head.

I picked up the phone and dialled a number.

I said, "Hello?"

My friend asked, "Wat is wrong? I know something is wrong by the tone of your voice. Where are you now? I come and look for you."

I cried and laughed at the same time, "How you know?!?! I only said Hello"...

Immediately, I felt better.

All I needed was just a little care and concern. To know that someone out there still remembers that I have feelings too.

This is when I knew, that this was someone who genuinely cared for me.

And I will always remember this day till the day I die.

I will give this person so much more than I will ever give anyone else.