Friday, September 15, 2006

Gong Li & her gongs

In Straits Times today, under the Life section, there was a picture of Gong Li and her twin mammoths.

HOly MAma!!!
(say 'HO' and 'MA' with a loud, but short sudden tone)

I never knew she had such well-developed mammory glands. I mean, I knew she had boobs... but I never knew she had BOOBS boobs.... ... you know what I mean?

Boy am I envious.

I can practically visualise my sister (Gina)... ... placing her face in between Gong Li's huge gongs and turning her face left & right... rubbing her face all over the breasts.

(pls don't think that I'm sick for visualising that... cuz there was once when me & Gina were talking about big boobs and she just suddenly did that action... therefore, when I see this pic of Gong Li, that image of Gina just miraculously appear in my head)

I know you don't believe that Gina actually did that for real.

Well, I swear she did. One day, I'm going to convince her to take a video of herself doing that action... and I'll post it here.


I also can't help noticing the expression on Gong Li's face.

Let's take a close-up look...


That's scary.

Here's an EVEN closer close-up.

Take special notice at the vicious'ness in her eyes.

Look at the way she smiled... if that is even considered a smile... maybe more like a snarl with pearly whites.

Wow... I can practically feel my balls shrink (if I had balls).

Or... does it show an expression of mammory superiority?

Like saying, "my boobs are HUGE! And you can't do anything about yours! HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE"... ...

Yeah... I think that's what she's thinking of when she took this picture... ...


*flings arms across chest & dramatically runs into the dark corner*

It is women like her who makes me wanna love women (not the scary look part, I'm referring to the boobs).

Don't get me wrong. I love the male species.

But there's just something about those 2 globs of fatty tissue on a woman's chest... ... that makes people go crazy.

Boobs are basically just made up of fats. But what makes THOSE 2 humps of fats so different from your tummy fats... or your butt fats.... or arm fats.... or thigh fats??

A pair of boobs is like... a superhero on its own, with powers to unleash the hidden monster in our nether regions.

As I look at her pictures longer, I'm beginning to believe that if Gong Li actually went bra'less... and someone actually calls her from behind... and if she swings around abruptly... ... ... her one boob would slap against the other boob... ... and there would be a loud 'GONGGGGGG' sound.

... errr....


As we ponder on the wonders of the sound of Gongs, let's have (yet another) close-up on Gong Li's smooth creamy pillows....


I'm impressed...

*standing ovation*