Feeling Ultra-Miserable

My neck & back is super achy. It is to the point where my right ear gets blocked... I can hear myself breathing in my right ear... when I talk, there is an echo in that same stupid ear. It's damn irritating lor. This has been going on for abt 2 weeks liao. Why am I plagued with so much discomfort. And and and... every morning, I wake up feeling nauseous... ... imagine having a toothbrush at the back of your throat.


On top of that, I feel that being independent is downright torture. Living with non-family members is depressing and constricted...




1. i have to look for food on my own (when my mummy used to have food ready whenever i'm hungry... I MISS MUMMY!!!)


2. i get stressed out when ppl comment that i'm a 'Sleeping Beauty' becuz i sleep till late morning or if i take afternoon naps (my own mother doesn't even bother if i lie in bed all day... ... and i feel so misunderstood becuz i haven't been sleeping well for almost a year which is making me miserable yet again)... and so, i reluctantly wake up early even though i know that i will feel ultra-bored becuz there is absolutely nothing to do after i wake up.. which in turn makes me feel depressed becuz i could be in my own home watching dvd with my family... which will then lead to me lying motionlessly face-down in bed & write the word 'bored' in mandarin repeatedly with my right index finger until i feel more bored & think of something else to do

3. and when i complain tat i'm bored, ppl will suggest that i do something which had made me bored in the first place or will make me even more bored...

4. in the end, i just wan to surround myself with the chosen ones... ... and just relax and enjoy my day... ... basking in the comfort tat i am finally doing something which i like...

5. then i feel guilty for having fun while abandoning my duty... so i return back to Boredom Land and feel miserable again...



sianz...

AIYA! I KNOW YOU ALL DUN KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT LAH...

wat's the point of explaining... nobody will understand... i'm all alone in tis world... sore neck & back... feeling like i hv morning sickness... everyone is against me... i'm aging... i'm starting to hv wrinkles and fine lines on my face... and what's up with all these red spots on my body that looks like somebody dotted me with a red pen (do i have AIDS??? measles?? skin disease?!?! or worse... 'lao ren ban' aka aging spots?!?!)... and now, when i'm complaining in my blog, i feel like ppl will think i'm siao.

*sulks in misery*

MISERABLE!!!

i think i'm going into mid-life crisis...

I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M ALMOST 30!!!!!

WHY IN THE WORLD DO I HAVE TO GROW UP?!?!?! I wish my best friend was Tinkerbell and she can sprinkle some happy dust on me so that i can fly to Neverland.